Famous Funny Inspirational Words
344 Funny Inspirational quotes by 248 unique authors
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You never came out the way you came in.
— Francis Spufford
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Nothing will benefit human health and increase the chances for survival of life on Earth as much as the evolution to a vegetarian diet.
— Albert Einstein
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Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.
— Robert Bloch
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When you take the time to actually listen, with humility, to what people have to say, it's amazing what you can learn. Especially if the…
— Greg Mortenson
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To learn to succeed, you must first learn to fail.
— Michael Jordan
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I don't remember who said this, but there really are places in the heart you don't even know exist until you love a child.
— Anne Lamott
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The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.
— Will Rogers
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The trouble with practical jokes is that very often they get elected.
— Will Rogers
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All people know the same truth. Our lives consist of how we choose to distort it.
— Woody Allen
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I’m not going to die because I failed as someone else. I’m going to succeed as myself.
— Margaret Cho
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Don’t waste your energy trying to educate or change opinions; go over, under, through, and opinions will change organically when you’re the boss. Or they…
— Tina Fey
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You can’t be that kid standing at the top of the waterslide, overthinking it. You have to go down the chute.
— Tina Fey
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Sometimes you just have to put on lip gloss and pretend to be psyched.
— Mindy Kaling
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Teenage girls, please don’t worry about being super popular in high school, or being the best actress in high school, or the best athlete. Not…
— Mindy Kaling
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If I were invited to a dinner party with my characters, I wouldn't show up.
— Dr. Seuss
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Be so good they can't ignore you.
— Steve Martin
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When I look back on all these worries, I remember the story of the old man who said on his deathbed that he had had…
— Winston Churchill
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Those who believe they can do something and those who believe they can't are both right.
— Henry Ford
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It must be around forty, when you're "over the hill." I don't even know what that means and why it's a bad thing. When I…
— Ellen DeGeneres
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Who Wrote These Funny Inspirational Quotes
248 authors contributed a total of 344 Funny Inspirational Quotes, led by these top contributors: