Farts Quotes
56 quotes by 47 authors
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They didn't trademark everything back then. Now someone farts and they put a TM after it. Even Miller Lite says 'A Fine Pilsner Beer' on…
— Michael Jackson
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As soon as somebody farts around me, I think it's hilarious. This is something my brothers did that now the boys at work are obsessed…
— Jennifer Lawrence
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If you eat Chinese food, your farts come out like Chinese food. If you eat Mexican food, your farts come out like Mexican food. And…
— Megan Fox
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A dog is not intelligent. Never trust an animal that's surprised by it's own farts
— Frank Skinner
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The average pregnant woman farts 15 times that!
— Jessica Simpson
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I have a playlist of farts on my phone.
— Lena Headey
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I'm only interested in heavy metal when it's me who's playing it. I suppose it's a bit like smelling your own farts.
— John Entwistle
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It having been a very cold night last night I had got some cold, and so in pain by wind, and a sure precursor of…
— Samuel Pepys
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Modern music is three farts and a raspberry, orchestrated.
— John Barbirolli
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Don't be more serious than God. God invented dog farts.
— Peter Kreeft
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So familiar are eggs to us, however, that in the eighteenth century they were referred to as cackling farts, on the basis that chickens cackled…
— Mark Forsyth
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My dad was proud of himself when he farted. He sounds like he's strangling a chicken when he farts.
— Carl Barron
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If the game is run properly as a professional game, you do not need 57 old farts running rugby.
— Will Carling
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Because nitrous oxide [released by nitrate-fertilised soil] is 296 times stronger than COâ‚‚ at global warming and methane [cow farts] is about 26 times as…
— Thom Hartmann
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Even the idea of a fart makes me laugh. Saying the word 'fart' makes me laugh. I have iFart on my phone. I have remote…
— George Clooney
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At one time or another, farts have coincided with every other sound, including this quote.
— Craig Benzine
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Clichés are static, the emotion behind them long spent. If you are tempted to use them, here is a saying of my mother’s: Fang pi…
— Amy Tan
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Freedom, Truth, Honour — you could rattle off a hundred such words and behind every one of them would gather a thousand punks, pompous little…
— Hunter S. Thompson
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I love baseball. I'll probably end up one of those old farts who go to spring training in Florida every year and drive from game…
— Steve Earle
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There's nothing worse than a bunch of jaded old farts, and that's a fact.
— Robert Plant
Who Wrote These Farts Quotes
47 authors contributed a total of 56 Farts Quotes, led by these top contributors: