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Dad Quotes by Bill Watterson
- Hello Dad! It is now three in the morning. Do you know where I am?
- [Calvin, who has the chicken pox, calls Susie on the telephone.] Susie: Hello? Calvin: Hi, Susie! It's me, Calvin! I was wondering if you'd like…
- Hee hee hee! You should've seen the look on your face!" "If mom and dad cared about me at all, they'd buy me some infra-red…
- Hey Dad, will you buy me a flame thrower? Of course not. Don't be silly. Even if I didn't use it in the house?
- Dad, how do soldiers killing each other solve the world's problems?
- Mom and dad say I should make my life an example of the principles I believe in. But every time I do, they tell me…
- Calvin: Dad where do babies come from? Dad: Well Calvin, you simply go to Sears, buy the kit and follow the assembly instructions. Calvin: I…
- Since September it's just gotten colder and colder. There's less daylight now, I've noticed too. This can only mean one thing - the sun is…
- Dad: Honey, have you seen my glasses? I can"t find them. Mom: I haven't seen them. Calvin: (with glasses, to Dad) Calvin, go do something…
- Calvin: Somewhere in Communist Russia I'll bet there's a little boy who has never known anything but censorship and oppression. But maybe he's heard of…
- Barney's Dad was really bad so Barney hatched a plan when his dad said "Eat your peas." Barney shouted no and ran Barney tricked his…
More Dad Quotes
- I'm a father. It isn't just my life any more. I don't want my kid finding bottles in the house or seeing… — Billie Joe Armstrong
- My dad was an architect, and he wasn't a rich guy, but in our little world in Philadelphia, he was famous. He… — Kevin Bacon
- My father was a physicist and also an activist. My first public protest was with my dad at Stanford. I came by… — Joan Baez
- A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again. — Enid Bagnold
- Look, I've got incredible pride for my family. I've absolutely fallen into that cliche of a dad who could just happily talk… — Christian Bale
- I wanted to be a mechanic. When I was 14 I wanted to quit school and go work on my car. But… — Eric Bana
- I hate being clean-shaven. My daughter gets very upset if I shave and says, 'Bring back the spikes, Dad.' — Eric Bana
- Great dad. Yeah, he would ask me for money on birthdays and, you know, inappropriate times. And I just wrote him off… — Drew Barrymore
- When I used to watch comedians with my dad, he laid it all out for me. He wanted to be a comedian… — Roseanne Barr
- Now, if you're Al Gore, you can afford $10 a pop for squiggly-pig-tailed fluorescent light bulbs. But if you're mainstream America, two… — Joe Barton
- I'm the whitest guy you will ever meet. The first time I saw an African-American, my dad had to tell me to… — Glenn Beck
- I'm a dad, and I no longer see a way for my kids to even inherit the money that I'm making, let… — Glenn Beck