Condom Quotes

136 quotes by 104 authors

Jack and Jill went up the hill and did it in the water Jack slipped His condom ripped and they ended up having a daughter.… — Broken Soul
Using a condom Is like wearing your seatbelt. You don't wear it for traffic cops but for your own good. — Unknown Author
Here's a condom. I figured since you're acting like a dick you should start to dress like one. — Patience
Bitch please, your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory. — Manish Bhagtani
I need a human size condom, Because life loves to Fu(k me up in the @$$. — Dustin Barbadillo-aton
I don't give a fuck, Without condom. — Unknown Author
Women need to protect themselves. You put that condom in your purse and save your own fucking life. - Lady Gaga — Lady Gaga
Trust is something that you have in a condom when the partner is not your spouse — Green Monk
Put a condom on your heart, I'm gonna fuck your feelings.. — Green Monk
If I could go back in time, I would give your parents a condom — Green Monk
Depending on someone is like when the condom breaks, only time will tell. — Gee Linder
Getting a blowjob with a condom on is like leaving your underwear on while taking a shit! — Green Monk
How can you tell if a woman is paranoid? You find her vibrator -- and it's wearing a condom! — Green Monk
Dating a Cashier is All Fun and Shxxt Till you Try and Get laid with her and She Asks ''PLASTIC?'' When she wants you to… — Unknown Author
I don't have to say 'Rap it up' every two seconds, or 'Don't do drugs' every two seconds. They know they're not supposed to use… — Curtis Jackson
Some people use just one condom, right? But we use tons — Tracey Emin
Safe sex - with a condom, rubber gloves and a wet suit is fine as long as you don't fall in love. — Kerry Thornley
Women need to protect themselves. You put that condom in your purse and save your own f***** life — Lady Gaga
You can wear a condom but you cant come here — Lil Wayne
Bitches always on my dick, I wear a condom when I shit! — J. Cole

Who Wrote These Condom Quotes

104 authors contributed a total of 136 Condom Quotes, led by these top contributors: