Condom Quotes

136 quotes by 104 authors

You're going to find this hard to believe, but cops aren't required to carry emergency condoms." Joe Morelli — Janet Evanovich
Now, this is where I draw the line! It's bad enough everybody in town's going to be thinkin' I'm sleeping with a depressed, lice-ridden, hemorrhoidal… — Susan Elizabeth Phillips
For one moment we are not failed tests and broken condoms and cheating on essays; we are crayons and lunch boxes and swinging so high… — Laurie Halse Anderson
Indeed, religion allows people to imagine that their concerns are moral when they are highly immoral - that is, when pressing these concerns inflicts unnecessary… — Sam Harris
We tilt our heads back and open wide. The snow drifts into our zombie mouths crawling with grease and curses and tobacco flakes and cavities… — Laurie Halse Anderson
Oh yeah, this was so comforting. Like a porcupine in a condom factory.â€™ (Danger) — Sherrilyn Kenyon
Some words have multiple meanings. Scholastic, aware that I'm allergic to preservatives, kindly got someone to translate the phrase "I can only eat food without… — Maggie Stiefvater
Jim eyed me for a couple of seconds, then got off the bed and went to curl up on the pile of blankets I'd arranged… — Katie MacAlister
but I don't want to wear a condom because I don't feel anything," and she says calmly... glaring at me,"If you don't use one you're… — Bret Easton Ellis
a salesman is an it that stinks to please but whether to please itself or someone else makes no more difference than if it sells… — E E Cummings
Ranger cradled my face in his hands, using his thumbs to wipe the tears from my eyes. "The ceremony is over. Can you make it… — Janet Evanovich
Bracelets with white symbols?â€ Michael made the question casual; in fact, he bent his head and concentrated on tuning his guitar, not that it needed… — Rachel Caine
Since i couldn't remember the "real" first time i'd lost my virginity, this would have become my de facto first time. I wanted a better… — Gabrielle Zevin
The condom broke. I know how stupid that sounds. It's the reproductive version of the dog ate my homework. — Jennifer Weiner
I could become a nun even if I am a non-believer. I'll learn to fake it like Nick did with me. I will minister the… — Rachel Cohn
I bought a packet of TrojanÂ® Ultra Pleasure Extra Sensitive condoms: â€˜No. 1 in AMERICAâ€™. They smell nothing like a positive first sexual experience. — Joe Dunthorne
Five trolls in a dra-a-a-a-ag,' the four-inch man sang from my shoulder. 'Four purple condoms, three French ticklers, two horny vamps and a succubus in… — Kim Harrison
I wouldn't touch a hot dog unless you put a condom on it! You realize that the job of a hot dog is to use… — Bill Maher
I brought a condom," I tell her when I slide her panties down. We're both hot and sweaty, and I can't resist hr anymore. "I… — Simone Elkeles
Do you happen to have another Condom? I think I've discovered the cure for headaches. — Stephen King

Who Wrote These Condom Quotes

104 authors contributed a total of 136 Condom Quotes, led by these top contributors: