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Best Any Quotations by Mark Twain
- If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way.
- Drag your thoughts away from your troubles... by the ears, by the heels, or any other way you can manage it.
- I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and resting.
- Hain't we got all the fools in town on our side? And hain't that a big enough majority in any town?
- I haven't any right to criticize books, and I don't do it except when I hate them. I often want to criticize Jane Austen, but…
- He said that man’s heart was the only bad heart in the animal kingdom; that man was the only animal capable of feeling malice, envy,…
- Of course, no man is entirely in his right mind at any time.
- I don't see any use in having a uniform and arbitrary way of spelling words. We might as well make all clothes alike and cook…
- All I care to know about a man is that he is a human being... he can't be any worse.
- When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be…
- Sufficient unto the day is one baby. As long as you are in your right mind don't you ever pray for twins. Twins amount to…
- There is no such thing as material covetousness. All covetousness is spiritual. ...Any so-called material thing that you want is merely a symbol: you want…
- Be respectful to your superiors, if you have any.
- There are people who strictly deprive themselves of each and every eatable, drinkable, and smokable which has in any way acquired a shady reputation. They…
- A cat is more intelligent than people believe, and can be taught any crime.
- I notice that you use plain, simple language, short words and brief sentences. That is the way to write English―it is the modern way and…
- Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?
- There warn't anybody at the church, except maybe a hog or two, for there warn't any lock on the door, and hogs likes a puncheon…
- It is a time when one’s spirit is subdued and sad, one knows not why; when the past seems a storm-swept desolation, life a vanity…
- Habit is habit, and not to be flung out of the window by any man, but coaxed down-stairs one step at a time.
- The fact that man knows right from wrong proves his intellectual superiority to the other creatures; but the fact that he can do wrong proves…
- All men have heard of the Mormon Bible, but few except the "elect" have seen it, or, at least, taken the trouble to read it.…
- It is my belief that nearly any invented quotation, played with confidence, stands a good chance to deceive.
- It is just like man's vanity and impertinence to call an animal dumb because it is dumb to his dull perceptions. Heaven is by favor;…
- One must travel, to learn. Every day, now, old Scriptural phrases that never possessed any significance for me before, take to themselves a meaning.
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