Thegr81 Quotes

70 quotes in 844 categories

• In my next life I want to live my life backwards. You start out dead and get that out of the way. Then you wake… Alcohol
• Next years Superbowl has been changed to Motel 6. They'll leave the lights on. Been
• There's a reason why sober and so bored sound almost exactly the same Almost Exactly
• A Whoopee cushion filled with gravy adds a hilarious new dimension to a rather tiresome practical joke Adds
• I bet Rihanna will be on the cover of Chris Brown's greatest hits CD. Bet
• When my hands are cold I warm them between my thighs. Are your ears cold? Cold
• Mitt Romney spent the day in a tux just in case people came to their senses. Came
• When I was a boy, Mom would send me down to the corner store with $1 and I would get 5 bags of potatoes, 2… Bags
• Every time Nicki Minaj tells someone their voice isn't good enough on Idol, someone is crushed to death by the weight of the irony. Crushed
• I'm going to be the first person to land on the sun! I know what your thinking and thats why I will be going at… Epic
• I used to say it takes a lot of balls to publicly admit you cheated, but Lance Armstrong proved it only takes one. Admit
• Joe Biden wants to meet with video game developers about gun control. That's like meeting with Kristen Stewart to learn how to act. Act
• I wonder what its like to fart in zero gravity. Does it like...propel you forward? These are things people need to know NASA! Fart
• Before you act, listen. Before you react, think. Before you spend, earn, Before you pray, forgive. Before you post, check for typos. Act
• 1. Sit down next to stranger on park bench. 2. Place an envelope beside him. 3. Whisper, It has to look like an accident. 4.… Accident
• If you don't want your heart to be easily broken, don't let yourself be easily taken...... ;) Broken
• Dreams are like stars, you may never touch them But If you follow them they Will lead you to your destiny. Goodnight. Destiny
• I wish my BOOK OF LIFE was written in pencil,there are few pages I would like to erase, Book
• Life is not measured by the breaths we take but by the MOMENTS tht take our BREATH AWAY Breath
• I LOVE THE ONES WHO ARE IN MY LIFE AND MAKE IT AMAZING AND I THANK THE ONES WHO LEFT MY LIFE AND MADE IT… Amazing

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