I still can't believe you asked mini Chewbacca to the winter formal! — RJ Berger Formal Copy Share Image
I'm tired of attractive guys who wouldn't flatten me during sex. — RJ Berger Attractive guys Copy Share Image
Fact. of all high school girls lose their virginity at school-sponsored dances. — RJ Berger Dance Copy Share Image
Look, my dating life up until now has been a complete disaster, and if I'm not careful, my virginity will take on,… — RJ Berger Dating Copy Share Image
First off, I've never seen one of you two cream puffs break a sweat. And second, that wasn't wrestling. That was two… — RJ Berger Cream puffs Copy Share Image
I'm gonna get some bite marks on my hang-low Saturday. Kevin, assuming you're even capable of getting a boner after sitting on… — RJ Berger Boner Copy Share Image
My name is R.J. Berger, and crime doesn't pay... at least not for me. — RJ Berger Crime Copy Share Image
She's, um... Yeah, yeah, yeah, the one that looks like one of them klingons from Star Wars. — RJ Berger Looks Copy Share Image
It's gonna be epic. Not as epic as the sex I'll be having after the winter formal. — RJ Berger Epic Copy Share Image
I'm telling you, dude, school dances, they're just a conspiracy — RJ Berger Conspiracy Copy Share Image
Most guys wouldn't be caught dead with a deaf girl! But, hey, I'm not most guys! — RJ Berger Deaf Copy Share Image
When you look back on your sorry-ass life 30 years from now, do you want to be the loser who did the… — RJ Berger Life Copy Share Image
