Joseph Heller Quotes

142 quotes in 1733 categories

• I'm gonna live forever, or die trying.
• I'd like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the whole field to private individuals.
• The enemy is anybody who's going to get you killed, no matter which side he's on.
• I had examined myself pretty thoroughly and discovered that I was unfit for military service.
• Let someone else get killed!
• Suppose everyone on our side felt that way?
• Well then I'd certainly be a damned fool to feel any other way, wouldn't I?
• And anything worth dying for
• They can do anything we can't stop them from doing.
• The question is: what is a sane man to do in an insane society?
• The Lord gave us farmers two strong hands so we could grab as much as we could with both of them.
• If God was dead, how could I feel this bad?
• Just for once I'd like to see all these things sort of straightened out, with each person getting exactly what he deserves. It might give…
• Fortunately, just when things were blackest, the war broke out.
• But the God I don't believe in is a good God, a just God, a merciful God. He's not the mean and stupid God you…
• Hungry Joe collected lists of fatal diseases and arranged them in alphabetical order so that he could put his finger without delay on any one…
• There was only one catch and that was Catch22, which specified that a concern for one's safety in the face of dangers that were real…
• Remember that everyone deserves some fun during working hours.
• Gold was not altogether certain what, anatomically, a gorge was, but he knew that his was rising.
• I think in every country that there is at least one executive who is scared of going crazy.

Browse Joseph Heller Quotes by Category