Jerry Stiller

I've got a prostate the size of a honeydew and a head full of bad memories.

— Jerry Stiller

The worst thing in this business is to be thought of as a no-talent.

— Jerry Stiller

Anne is very forgiving. She doesn't care about money, being rich, or clothes. We never argued about finances.

— Jerry Stiller

Creative comedy is like growing geraniums in a mine field

— Jerry Stiller

Anne hated the idea of putting me down in front of the audience.

— Jerry Stiller

During the Great Depression, when people laughed their worries disappeared. Audiences loved these funny men. I decided to become one.

— Jerry Stiller

Would you go to see a brilliant actor who's been framed for something that he didn't do, and put him on a…

— Jerry Stiller

I shave without using shaving cream

— Jerry Stiller

I don't think my judgment is that good. I don't know what is funny

— Jerry Stiller

I've been around the block a lot and I've had a merry trail for 55 years.

— Jerry Stiller

I loved the idea of touching base with an audience.

— Jerry Stiller

We managed to hang in there. Today when people get married there's a tendency to run away when things get tough. There…

— Jerry Stiller

Money is sensual.

— Jerry Stiller

My father and mother. I figured if I could make them laugh, they'd stop fighting. I stole all their material.

— Jerry Stiller

Being on a sitcom stops me from getting Alzheimer's

— Jerry Stiller

Some of the routines come back very easily. We do it off the top of our heads

— Jerry Stiller

I ask myself why I do it [work]. Maybe it's to prove I'm still around. It takes a lot out of my…

— Jerry Stiller

Never go for the punch line. There might be something funnier on the way

— Jerry Stiller

We are even better looking on the small screen

— Jerry Stiller

It can make you sad to look at pictures from your youth. So there's a trick to it. The trick is not…

— Jerry Stiller

Hollywood never knew there was a Vietnam War until they made the movie.

— Jerry Stiller