All Greg Gutfeld Quotes
- Chris Matthews is so nuts that if he ate a snickers bar it would be cannibalism. Ate
- Hollywood's schizophrenia over guns is matched only by their attitude toward taxes. Ever wonder why they film in Vancouver so often? It ain't for the… Attitude
- Why is our media quick to find evil in our local police, but tnot in Islamic terror? Evil
- [Obamacare] has to be enforced because nobody wants it. This is the nature of progressive government they don't care if it's not good for you.… Care
- Ask dumb questions and listen quietly for the answers. That's a wisdom stair climber. Answers
- Steer clear of pot. It's an ambition zapper. Wait till you've made it. When you're 45 buy a bong. But for now, buy a suit. Ambition
- Move somewhere with decent public transit so you don't drive drunk and hit somebody. Decent
- If you're hiring, if you're the person doing the hiring, forgive a scar or two. Remember that when we were young, we were also idiots.… Cameras
- One thing I noticed when I was young was I was impatient for success. I think everybody is impatient for success. It will come. But… Crazy
- Delayed gratification is the one thing we ignore these days. And if you delay it, it becomes more pleasurable later in life. Becomes
- Commencement addresses are usually garbage. They're for colleges seeking publicity. Addresses
- I have friends my age who started smoking pot when they got out of college. They didn't get anywhere. But if they drank, they managed… Age
- I never quit. I just got fired. Fired
- You should try to get fired once in a while. It's good for you. Fired
- I guess if your heart's in the right place, the trash can go anywhere. Anywhere
- How can you have a reasonable debate with people who are constantly changing the panic? They are moving the panic to a greater wave of… Changing
- When you have a TV show or when you are running a magazine, you have to remember that your audience isn't rich. They're not made… Audience
- Legal gun ownership always prevails over the emotionalism of the gun control movement. Always Prevails
- Is your relationship strong enough to survive a trip to Ikea? Is their furniture strong enough to survive a relationship? Have you ever bought a… Bed
- The best thing about Ikea - I'm going to do a quiz here - the names. Do you know what a Floria Fin (ph) is?… Bar