Fran Lebowitz Quotes

147 quotes in 1695 categories

• Think before you speak. Read before you think. This will give you something to think about that you didn't make up yourself - a wise…
• When people say, 'Doesn't Gloria [Vanderbilt] look great? She's 85.' I say, 'Yes, she was a raving beauty when she was 20,' that's the key.…
• What's the point of being young if you're not going to make new things, I wonder?
• Children ask better questions than adults. "May I have a cookie?" "Why is the sky blue?" and "What does a cow say?" are far more…
• Bread that must be sliced with an axe is bread that is too nourishing.
• While it is undeniably true that people love a surprise, it is equally true that they are seldom pleased to suddenly and without warning happen…
• The only appropriate response to the question, 'Can I be frank?' is, 'Yes, if I can be Barbara.
• Smoking is, as far as I'm concerned, the entire point of being an adult.
• Never allow your child to call you by your first name. He hasn't known you long enough.
• Smoking is the great romance of my lifetime. If I could find someone I wanted forty-five times a day, perhaps I could stop.
• In New York, people are very overbooked.You say, When do you want to have dinner? It's May. They say, What about October? And then they…
• Educational television should be absolutely forbidden. It can only lead to unreasonable disappointment when your child discovers that the letters of the alphabet do not…
• Money...buys privacy, silence. The less money you have, the noisier it is; the thinner your walls, the closer your neighbors.... The first thing you notice…
• Civilised adults do not take apple juice with dinner.
• London: A place you go to get bronchitis.
• New York City is filled with the same kind of people I left New Jersey to get away from.
• Women who insist upon having the same options as men would do well to consider the option of being the strong, silent type
• I'm not interested in being a wife. I'm interested in being an empress.
• Knowingness is sexy. The opposite of sexy is naivete.
• I love being in love. I don't think anything compares with it, though I consider it very disruptive.

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