Best Carol Burnett Quotes
- I don't have false teeth. Do you think I'd buy teeth like these? Buy
- Celebrity was a long time in coming; it will go away. Everything goes away. Away Everything
- Because nobody goes through life without a scar. Funny
- You have to go through the falling down in order to learn to walk. It helps to know that you can survive it. That's an… Down
- I'm really not that funny in real life. But I am the best audience one could find. I love to laugh. Audience
- I liked myself better when I wasnt me. Better
- If you want to know the feeling [of labor pain], just take your bottom lip and pull it over your head. Birth
- I think we're here for each other. Each
- The first time someone said, 'What are your measurements?' I answered, '37, 24, 38 - but not necessarily in that order.' Answered
- The audience is never wrong. Audience
- You have to have faith that there is a reason you go through certain things. I can't say I'm glad to go through pain, but… Certain
- I couldn't get the laughter out of my head. It wasn't career. It wasn't even a choice. It was a calling. Calling
- I can't tell a joke to save my soul. It's just not my thing, though I love to listen to jokes. Inspirational
- I love the writing. I love the idea of typing and seeing it on the computer and printing it out myself and, you know, moving… Computer
- I think the hardest thing to do in the world, show-business-wise, is write comedy. Business
- I never regretted turning down anything, I never regretted losing a job because I always felt something else was out there. Always Felt
- I don't eat much meat, fish, or poultry. Eat
- I have a great memory. Great
- When someone who is known for being comedic does something straight, it's always "a big breakthrough" or a "radical departure." Why is is no one… Actor
- Comedy = tragedy + time. Comedy
- No one ever said life was fair. Just Eventful. Eventful
- I have always grown from my problems and challenges, from the things that don't work out, that's when I've really learned. Adversity
- People invite me to dinner not because I can cook, but because I like to clean up. I get immediate gratification from windex. Yes, I… Clean
- I wanted to be on Broadway, but in musical comedy. Broadway
- My childhood was rough, we were poor and my parents were alcoholics, but nobody was mean. I knew I was loved. We were on welfare,… Abandoned