Bobby Heenan

He's the only man I know of who can hide his own easter eggs.

— Bobby Heenan

Dusty Rhodes and Sapphire. They're a lovely twosome, or threesome, or foursome, or twenty-fifthsome.

— Bobby Heenan

Remember folks, fish are like relatives. After two days, they stink.

— Bobby Heenan

I insulted people. I had to - they deserved it. They didn't have any talent. They stunk. They were horrible! But it…

— Bobby Heenan

You win some and you lose some. Unless you're Virgil, then you lose them all.

— Bobby Heenan

If you're poor and you do something stupid, you're nuts. If you're rich and do something stupid, you're eccentric.

— Bobby Heenan

What happened there? My monitor went out.

— Bobby Heenan

A friend in need is a pest.

— Bobby Heenan

Oh, I knew he was gonna do that. I just knew he was gonna do that. He don't need Jannetty. I told…

— Bobby Heenan

You're 83? Really? You don't look it. I would've guessed 81 or 82.

— Bobby Heenan

When's the last time you went into a barber shop and saw everyone there unconsious?

— Bobby Heenan

You don't have to yell at me Schiavone. I'm not blind!

— Bobby Heenan

This guy makes coffee nervous.

— Bobby Heenan

You know they say money can't buy happiness. Give me 50 bucks and watch me smile

— Bobby Heenan

I asked Stu Hart earlier. I said, 'Stu, you gotta be proud of your boys.' He said, 'I have boys?'

— Bobby Heenan

Koko B. Ware … his mom’s first name was Tupper.

— Bobby Heenan

I heard a rumor that your mom and dad ran away from home.

— Bobby Heenan

Obviously some cheap motel is missing a shower curtain.

— Bobby Heenan

WCW wasn't what I thought it should be. I thought it could be better. I would make suggestions, but nobody would want…

— Bobby Heenan

There's the downtown area of Tupelo. Did you see the skyscrapers? Two stories.

— Bobby Heenan

Are there any swamps in Oklahoma? Yes, there is. It's called Tulsa.

— Bobby Heenan

Janetty tried to dive through the window to escape, what an act of cowardice.

— Bobby Heenan

You'd have a good voice, if it ever came out of your throat

— Bobby Heenan

What are you doing, looking at me with one eye and chasing a fly with the other?

— Bobby Heenan

Just look at the way he hangs in mid air!

— Bobby Heenan