All Ambrose Bierce Quotes
- GNU, n. An animal of South Africa, which in its domesticated state resembles a horse, a buffalo and a stag. In its wild condition it… Africa
- COMMENDATION n. The tribute that we pay to achievements that resembles but do not equal our own. Achievement
- EFFECT, n. The second of two phenomena which always occur together in the same order. The first, called a Cause, is said to generate the… Always Occur
- A wedding is a ceremony at which two persons undertake to become one, one undertakes to become nothing, and nothing undertakes to become supportable. Become Nothing
- FINANCE, n. The art or science of managing revenues and resources for the best advantage of the manager. The pronunciation of this word with the… Accent
- ORATORY, n. A conspiracy between speech and action to cheat the understanding. A tyranny tempered by stenography. Action
- RABBLE, n. In a republic, those who exercise a supreme authority tempered by fraudulent elections. The rabble is like the sacred Simurgh, of Arabian fable… Arabian
- PASTIME, n. A device for promoting dejection. Gentle exercise for intellectual debility. Debility
- DELUSION, n. The father of a most respectable family, comprising Enthusiasm, Affection, Self-denial, Faith, Hope, Charity and many other goodly sons and daughters. Affection
- Birth: The first and direst of all disasters. All
- MAGIC, n. An art of converting superstition into coin. There are other arts serving the same high purpose, but the discreet lexicographer does not name… Art
- Book - Learning : The dunce's derisive term for all knowledge that transcends his own impertinent ignorance. All
- SATIRE, n. An obsolete kind of literary composition in which the vices and follies of the author's enemies were expounded with imperfect tenderness. Composition
- DIGESTION, n. The conversion of victuals into virtues. When the process is imperfect, vices are evolved instead - a circumstance from which that wicked writer,… Circumstance
- NOISE, n. A stench in the ear. Undomesticated music. The chief product and authenticating sign of civilization. Authenticating
- REFLECTION,n: An Action of the mind whereby we obtain a clearer view of our relation to the things of yesterday and are able to avoid… Able
- Magic: (n) The art of converting superstition into coin. Art
- RIDICULE, n. Words designed to show that the person of whom they are uttered is devoid of the dignity of character distinguishing him who utters… Character
- MISDEMEANOR, n. An infraction of the law having less dignity than a felony and constituting no claim to admittance into the best criminal society. Admittance
- MEDICINE, n. A stone flung down the Bowery to kill a dog in Broadway. Bowery
- POTABLE, n. Suitable for drinking. Water is said to be potable; indeed, some declare it our natural beverage, although even they find it palatable only… Age
- Before undergoing a surgical operation, arrange your temporal affairs. You may live. Affair
- SYLLOGISM, n. A logical formula consisting of a major and a minor assumption and an inconsequent. Assumption
- HYENA, n. A beast held in reverence by some oriental nations from its habit of frequenting at night the burial-places of the dead. But the… Beast
- GRAVE, n. A place in which the dead are laid to await the coming of the medical student. Await