“With small-town America it's always either zombies or communists isn't it.” — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“I picked it up 'cause the back of the box said the Kinect had "finally found its hardcore game" and I interpreted… — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“New Super Mario Br - I'm just gonna call it "Steve" from now on, all right?” — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“Horrors from beyond the veil of time and space are coming to eat us so shut up, sounds like a pretty good… — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“What were they going to do after killing the president, declare themselves king?” — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“Readers of my online journal - I refuse to use the word blog because it sounds like something that lives on a… — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“My non American viewers. Who understand that the world does not consist solely of a single nation sailing across an infinite sea… — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“It's way too long and I gave up on it. Abandoning forever an innocent child to a hostile and unforgiving land. Sometimes… — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“This is about as simple as games get. There isn't even the paltriest context for what you're doing; you're not exacting revenge… — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“it's difficult to root for America when the villains of the story live in a ditch and are armed with jagged rocks.… — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“The root problem with Christianity is that their god is supposed to be all-powerful and benevolent. It sounds like an easy sell,… — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“Making the decision to leave Valve strikes me as right up there with turning down the throne to Narnia, but then call… — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“It could have been a thief or a murderer. I considered crying out. A thief would run away, but a murderer would… — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“What can you do with a character who responds to everything by either punching it or deploying Bat Anti-thing Spray. . .… — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“There's a new spell you get around level 50 called "Mirror Image" which might as well be called "Reap On, Ye Fucking… — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“Could somebody please invade America? I know it's not exactly prime real estate and can just about produce corn and shitty TV,… — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“A Shadow's Tale - I'm going to keep calling it A Shadow's Tale because fuck America for wanting to be different and… — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“How exactly does a steam-powered gun turret differentiate between friend and foe? I wasn't aware that boiled water could form allegiances.” — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“It creates an effective contrast, like riding a bike down a long and peaceful country road and every other hundred yards the… — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“Maybe she's preemptively getting her karmic backlash for that, but there's something icky about all this. Yes, the "hello, boys" chest like… — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“A good story is like a good bowel movement: it's only really satisfying once it's ended, because if you just keep going eventually your… — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“The Necromancer's Tower squatted over the river like an incontinent titan.” — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
For me, Modern Warfare 3 's plot makes its signature turn around the bend when Russia invades Europe. As in, all of it. Simultaneously.… — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“My non American viewers. Who understand that the world does not consist solely of a single nation sailing across an infinite sea of migrant… — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“I am a crab. I am thinking crabby thoughts. I am tightening my grip on this rock with my big red pincers.” — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“I realized that the job of a hero is not to save the galaxy, or rescue princesses, or slay all the dragons. That may… — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“Horrors from beyond the veil of time and space are coming to eat us so shut up, sounds like a pretty good draw card… — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“I'd sometimes pictured myself bravely sacrificing my life to save another, but my preference had always been that it be someone I actually liked.” — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“The obedient Pit bull becomes the escaped tiger and it's got a knife” — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
“What were they going to do after killing the president, declare themselves king?” — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
Reality is a cruel and unintuitive place with frustrating gameplay mechanics. (Press X to thanklessly toil your life away) — Yahtzee Croshaw Copy Share Image
