Smile. Nod. Say something witty before he finds out what an incredible geek you are. — Ellen Hopkins Copy Share Image
It was the experience of mystery - even if mixed with fear - that engendered religion. — Albert Einstein Copy Share Image
Remorse presupposes enough self-forgetfulness to feel the pain ofothers. — Helen Prejean Copy Share Image
Site Engineer is one who thinks single woman can deliver nine babies in one month. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I've never felt this way about anyone before. - Every girl, literally every time they like a guy — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
On one thing, at least, men & women both agree: They both distrust women. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
“Monique bit at the side of lip. “He’s pretty active, I don’t want to impose…” Tony stood and scooped up the puppy.… — Kirsten Fullmer Copy Share Image
Wit is a pleasure-giving thing, largely because it eludes reason; but in the apprehension of an absurdity through the working of the… — Agnes Repplier Copy Share Image
BUREAUCRACY You have two cows. The government takes them both, shoots one, milks the other, pays you for the milk, and then… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Less judgment than wit is more sail than ballast. Yet it must be confessed that wit given an edge to sense, and… — William Penn Copy Share Image
Good girls think they're not fully dressed without a strand of pearls Bad girls think they're fully dressed with just a strand… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I've learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades, and there had better be… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
“For, let's face it, digression is the soul of wit. Take philosophic asides away from Dante, Milton or Hamlet's father's ghost and… — Ray Bradbury Copy Share Image
Whether I'm writing a novel about a guy mourning the death of his father or whether I'm writing a show about people… — Jonathan Tropper Copy Share Image
I would have girls regard themselves not as adjectives but as nouns. — Elizabeth Cady Stanton Copy Share Image
Being witty was the only side effect of being depressed that was working for me. — Jessi Klein Copy Share Image
You know what's fun? Go to a German restaurant and insist on using chopsticks. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Animal testing is a terrible idea. They get nervous and give the wrong answers. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
“If you can't impress them with your argument, impress them with your actions.” — Amit Kalantri Copy Share Image
It should be perfectly legal to kill people who brag about not owning a TV. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
In a democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your count that votes. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
My mom still tells me not to talk to strangers. Im 22 mom, I dont talk to strangers, I sleep with them. — Azgraybebly Joslan Copy Share Image
What if you're in hell, and you're mad at someone, where do you tell them to go? — Psyche_Zeroh Copy Share Image
Sometimes I'll see a girl jogging that's so sexy, I'll jog directly behind her ass until she gets home. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
#3 pencils and quadrille pads.(when asked what CAD tools he used to design the Cray I supercomputer ) — Seymour Cray Copy Share Image
You're my ex. That means I no longer owe you any answers. Don't worry about who I'm with now. It's not you. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If you can't say goodbye to your past, then you just can't say hello to your future. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Women, somehow, have the same fear of witty men as of fireworks. — Douglas William Jerrold Copy Share Image
“If time is money and you wasted my time, then give me back my money!” — Ljupka Cvetanova Copy Share Image
I just want someone to compliment my new underwear. Ugh, its so hard being a salesman in this day and age. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Instagram and nightclubs are where ugly people go to trick people into thinking they're hot. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Swearing was invented as a compromise between running away and fighting. — Finley Peter Dunne Copy Share Image
Wit is often a mask. If you tear it you will find either genius irritated or cleverness juggling. — Khalil Gibran Copy Share Image
Doctor: A person who kills your disease with pills and you with bills. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Tears running down my face like rain, who would have ever thought that love would come with so much pain. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
It's not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn't have the balls to do it. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
