I'm addicted to chocolate chip cookies. I mean that seriously. If there are chocolate chip cookies, I will devour them. — Hasan Minhaj Copy Share Image
If you and I believe two different things, I can attack you verbally all day, but if I can make you laugh… — Hasan Minhaj Copy Share Image
This first-generation narrative keeps happening over and over and over again, whether it was Irish or Jewish or our community, South Asians,… — Hasan Minhaj Copy Share Image
I've found the 90-10 rule to be pretty true: 90 percent of what I come up with and write down is kinda 'eh,' and… — Hasan Minhaj Copy Share Image
When you immerse yourself in a community, you tend to rise in that community. — Hasan Minhaj Copy Share Image
Aditi is a comedy superstar over in India. She's only one of three female English-speaking comedians in India. — Hasan Minhaj Copy Share Image
A lot of times, especially when it comes to political debates, people get caught up in esoteric statistics. So the realest thing I can… — Hasan Minhaj Copy Share Image
A lot of people in the media say that Donald Trump goes golfing too much, which raises a very important question: Why do you… — Hasan Minhaj Copy Share Image
As satirists, we get to stand on the sidelines of life and comment on what's happening. — Hasan Minhaj Copy Share Image
My dad was the only son from his entire family to come to America, and I was his only son. We had come to… — Hasan Minhaj Copy Share Image
When you can tailor your act, you want it to be about yourself but also about the people in the room and the experience… — Hasan Minhaj Copy Share Image
I like to have straight-up black coffee, but when you get it, sometimes you'll burn your tongue, or it spills on your hands, and… — Hasan Minhaj Copy Share Image
I just started the way most comics start, doing open mic shows around Sacramento and San Francisco, and eventually, I moved to L.A. After… — Hasan Minhaj Copy Share Image
Jokes for jokes' sake are kind of meaningless to me. I understand the value of them, but it doesn't speak to me as much.… — Hasan Minhaj Copy Share Image
