I have terrible short-term memory loss, which I like to think of as Presidential eligibility. — Paula Poundstone Copy Share Image
The mistakes that I made I made because I drank too much. I don't think that's going to happen any more. Am… — Paula Poundstone Copy Share Image
It's funny that we think of libraries as quiet demure places where we are shushed by dusty, bun-balancing, bespectacled women. The truth… — Paula Poundstone Copy Share Image
I mean, I do love clever and witty, but I think that the 'Three Stooges' were geniuses. They'd have to be for… — Paula Poundstone Copy Share Image
I have short-term memory loss, though I'd like to think of it as Persidential eligibility. — Paula Poundstone Copy Share Image
I think we need a 12-step group for non-stop talkers. We're going to call it On and On Anon. — Paula Poundstone Copy Share Image
The problem with cats is that they get the same exact look whether they see a moth or an ax-murderer. — Paula Poundstone Copy Share Image
I don't need a holiday or a feast to feel grateful for my children, the sun, the moon, the roof over my head, music,… — Paula Poundstone Copy Share Image
There are really only so many foods and so many ways you can prepare them. — Paula Poundstone Copy Share Image
I like to work on New Year's Eve. It has a nice spirit; a nice feel about it. If you are all about the… — Paula Poundstone Copy Share Image
“Deep-rooted happiness may require a sense of purpose. If I don't feel that I am in some small way contributing to the greater good,… — Paula Poundstone Copy Share Image
The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's just sort of a tired feeling. — Paula Poundstone Copy Share Image
I did auditions at a club called the Comedy Connection. They wanted nothing to do with me. But one night they were doing a… — Paula Poundstone Copy Share Image
I can make things, but I don't cook them, exactly. Like salmon, I can stick that in a pan. Or the other day I… — Paula Poundstone Copy Share Image
I've always thought that if my death was imminent, I would read. When I can't focus on a book, I tend to keep reading… — Paula Poundstone Copy Share Image
I know a little bit about handicapping. If the horse has an IV, you want to stay - away from it. — Paula Poundstone Copy Share Image
