“Second, clarify what you really don't want. This is the key to framing the and question. Think of what you are afraid will happen to you if you back away from your current strategy of trying to win or stay… — Kerry Patterson Copy Share Image
“People who are gifted at dialogue keep a constant vigil on safety. They pay attention to the content—that’s a given—and they watch for signs… — Kerry Patterson Copy Share Image
“Methods include cutting others off, overstating your facts, speaking in absolutes, changing subjects, or using directive questions to control the conversation.” — Kerry Patterson Copy Share Image
“Maybe we honor the abusive style of so many coaches and other public figures because their public actions lend credibility to our own private… — Kerry Patterson Copy Share Image
“For example, obesity costs the average person an extra $1,429 per year in increased health care costs. But since we’re not required to set… — Kerry Patterson Copy Share Image
“If the story is unflattering and the feeling is anger, adrenaline kicks in. Under the influence of adrenaline, blood leaves our brains to help… — Kerry Patterson Copy Share Image
“Second, clarify what you really don't want. This is the key to framing the and question. Think of what you are afraid will happen… — Kerry Patterson Copy Share Image
“We’re asking you to recode silence and violence as signs that people are feeling unsafe. We’re asking you to fight your natural tendency to… — Kerry Patterson Copy Share Image
“Let’s say that your significant other has been paying less and less attention to you. You realize he or she has a busy job,… — Kerry Patterson Copy Share Image
“The average human being is actually quite bad at predicting what he or she should do in order to be happier, and this inability… — Kerry Patterson Copy Share Image
“When under attack, our heart can take a similarly sudden and unconscious turn. When faced with pressure and strong opinions, we often stop worrying… — Kerry Patterson Copy Share Image
“What do I really want for myself? What do I really want for others? What do I really want for the relationship? Once you’ve… — Kerry Patterson Copy Share Image
“People who are skilled at dialogue do their best to make it safe for everyone to add their meaning to the shared pool--even ideas… — Kerry Patterson Copy Share Image
