You can tell you ate too much for Thanksgiving when you have to let your bathrobe out. — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
The turkey that President Obama will pardon this Thanksgiving is from California. The turkey said, "I don't need a pardon. I need… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Thanksgiving is the day when you turn to another family member and say, 'How long has Mom been drinking like this?' My… — David Letterman Copy Share Image
I hate turkeys. If you stand in the meat section at the grocery store long enough, you start to get mad at… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
You know that just before that first Thanksgiving dinner there was one wise, old Native American woman saying, Don't feed them. If… — Dylan Brody Copy Share Image
I have strong doubts that the first Thanksgiving even remotely resembled the 'history' I was told in second grade. But considering that… — Ellen Orleans Copy Share Image
So once in every year we throng Upon a day apart, to praise the Lord with feast and song in thankfulness of… — Arthur Guiterman Copy Share Image
All across America, we gather this week with the people we love to give thanks to God for the blessings in our… — George W. Bush Copy Share Image
What we're really talking about is a wonderful day set aside on the fourth Thursday of November when no one diets. I… — Erma Bombeck Copy Share Image
For flowers that bloom about our feet; For tender grass, so fresh, so sweet; For song of bird, and hum of bee;… — Ralph Waldo Emerson Copy Share Image
He who thanks but with the lips Thanks but in part; The full, the true Thanksgiving Comes from the heart. — John G. Shedd Copy Share Image
