“I want to check into a hotel for the night, order room service, and eat French fries while watching reality TV until I’m fucking comatose. Then I want to sleep for sixteen hours.” Motherhood is a joy.” — Lila Monroe Copy Share Image
“I’m a goddess right now; everyone should come and offer gifts of chocolate and mojitos. That’s my currency. “Do” — Lila Monroe Copy Share Image
“You have more fun with her than you do on your own. Everything’s an adventure. You’re compatible in the ways that matter. The sex… — Lila Monroe Copy Share Image
“Anger is a powerful force. It has started and ended wars, won the vote for marginalized groups like women and people of color, and… — Lila Monroe Copy Share Image
“I should invest in some serious real estate in the state of denial; it was fan-fucking-tastic there.” — Lila Monroe Copy Share Image
“Wait, is he . . . jealous? Well, who am I not to make the most of this unexpected gift?” — Lila Monroe Copy Share Image
“Ah well. When in Vegas, ignore the douches, let the good times roll, and always carry a spare set of panties in your purse,… — Lila Monroe Copy Share Image
“And when it comes to men . . . well, who wants a guy who’s three minutes and done when you could have a Mr. ‘Rock Your… — Lila Monroe Copy Share Image
“Open displays of emotion make me more uncomfortable than itching powder in a pair of sandpaper panties,” — Lila Monroe Copy Share Image
“Can we get them some ring pops, like in the proposal scene in Deadpool? Will I have to carry them down the aisle clenched… — Lila Monroe Copy Share Image
