Feeling essentially superior to other people is as sure a sign of poor self-esteem as feeling essentially inferior. — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
Through words we come to know the other person--and to be known. This knowing is at the heart of our deepest longings… — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
Many people value criticism in the early stage of a relationship, but become allergic to it over time. Remember this: No one… — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
Every time I open Facebook, I see a post with something like, "We must forgive or be prisoners of our own bitterness… — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
There are some things for which there is no apology, and on the question of slavery, there is no adequate apology for… — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
We begin to change the dynamic of our relationships as we are able to share our reactions to others without holding them… — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
The happiest people are focused on living their own life (not someone else's) as well as possible. — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
Judging people for whom they love (a same sex partner) rather than by whom they harm, should in itself merit a psychiatric… — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
The strongest relationships are between two people who can live without each other but don't want to. — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
People marry with a deep longing that their partner will tend to their wounds, not throw salt in them. Honor your partner's… — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
If you're married to an entrenched non-apologizer, it won't help to doggedly demand one. Some folks lack the self-esteem required to take… — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
“Letting go of anger and hate requires us to give up the hope for a different past, along with the hope of a fantasized… — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
“There’s a widespread belief that if you have solid self-esteem you don’t need outside affirmation and praise. This is patently untrue, by the way.” — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
It is an act of courage to acknowledge our own uncertainty and sit with it for a while. — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
Nothing you say can ensure that the other person will get it, or respond the way you want. You may never exceed his threshold… — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
If you exchanged wedding vows, tape them to your bathroom mirror and read them aloud to yourself every morning along with the ritual brushing… — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
Kids want nothing more than for all the important adults in their life to get along. — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
“People's sense of self worth is pivotal to their ability to look clearly at the hurt they've caused. The more solid one's sense of… — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
Being able to make a sincere apology - one that says, "Yes, I get it; I screwed up. Your feelings make sense, and I'm… — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
“Everyone freaks out. Sometimes the best we can do with fear is befriend it. Expect it and understand that fear will always reappear. Eventually… — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
The bolder and more courageous you are, the more you will learn about yourself. — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
Underground issues from one relationship or context invariably fuel our fires in another. — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
