And for all of you at home, you are all welcome to visit my store. You are also welcome to park off you motherparking parks, and go park yourself. But remember, don't park in a handicapped spot. — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
Great soul of Gandhi, cover your ears. You will not want to hear this! Listen, you inbred piece of Ku Klux Krap! You white people love to be racist, but the only races you can tell apart are Indianapolis and… — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
Nobody calls me a racist when I do redneck jokes. Jeff Foxworthy can do as many 'You might be a redneck jokes' as he… — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
I am frail like everyone else, and I take that into account when I talk about things. — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
People live in a place called Tornado Alley - and they're surprised when they get hit by a tornado. I'm sorry when they get… — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
When I was younger, I was angry. I was boisterous and loud. I was on top of the mountain, screaming at everybody, 'Look at… — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
When you are younger, you pretend to believe, but you are proving it to everyone and to yourself. The change comes when you know… — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
Here's what I know about the business I am in. It's all based on money. It's all based on ratings. — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
I've gotten in trouble with every race you can imagine. They say, 'I can't believe you talked about this - you're racist.' And I… — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
My choices are made out of love. When I go on stage now, I want to make people happy. I mean, when I get… — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
My comedy is about, lift yourself. See reality. Change the reality if you don't like it. But if you can't, then deal with things… — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
I can't imagine how unbelievable it would be to go to the Great Barrier Reef. — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
The beauty of not growing up middle class is that you don't think like the middle class. You don't have anything to protect, you… — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
