I have been recording every single one of my shows since 1994. Every single joke I've ever done is on a hard… — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
If you don't like your job, then change it by getting some better skills. Until then, shut up and get my burger… — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
Before I got into stand-up, I was a really quiet guy who had all these thoughts, all these things I wanted to… — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
For me, it's always better to tell people the truth, because people can accept the truth. — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
I'm just trying to be funny, trying to make people laugh, and trying to make the world a better place through some… — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
Nobody calls me a racist when I do redneck jokes. Jeff Foxworthy can do as many 'You might be a redneck jokes' as he… — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
I am frail like everyone else, and I take that into account when I talk about things. — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
People live in a place called Tornado Alley - and they're surprised when they get hit by a tornado. I'm sorry when they get… — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
When I was younger, I was angry. I was boisterous and loud. I was on top of the mountain, screaming at everybody, 'Look at… — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
When you are younger, you pretend to believe, but you are proving it to everyone and to yourself. The change comes when you know… — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
Here's what I know about the business I am in. It's all based on money. It's all based on ratings. — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
I've gotten in trouble with every race you can imagine. They say, 'I can't believe you talked about this - you're racist.' And I… — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
My choices are made out of love. When I go on stage now, I want to make people happy. I mean, when I get… — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
My comedy is about, lift yourself. See reality. Change the reality if you don't like it. But if you can't, then deal with things… — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
I can't imagine how unbelievable it would be to go to the Great Barrier Reef. — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
The beauty of not growing up middle class is that you don't think like the middle class. You don't have anything to protect, you… — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
