If your name is Sepp, at the bare minimum you’ve strangled someone in a bar fight. — John Oliver Copy Share Image
I don't know if there is some psychological thing of wanting to know where your doctor got his degree from before he… — John Oliver Copy Share Image
According to current Florida law you can get a gun, follow an unarmed minor, call the police, have them explicitly tell you… — John Oliver Copy Share Image
News is not a game show. You don't win a car if you happen to be right. — John Oliver Copy Share Image
If you’ve been here, in New York, it has been dominated by the UN General Assembly, the annual event where delegates come… — John Oliver Copy Share Image
If you vote for Democrats, you might as well give Al Quaeda a death ray and a manual. — John Oliver Copy Share Image
The poverty line is like the age of consent: if you find yourself parsing exactly where it is, you’ve probably already done… — John Oliver Copy Share Image
I've always been interested in socially political, or overtly political, comedy. And I guess I've always liked to channel some kind of personal element… — John Oliver Copy Share Image
I knew I was going to go into the field and make fun of people to their faces. I knew what I was getting… — John Oliver Copy Share Image
Once you learn how to make people laugh, then you get to choose exactly how you want to make them laugh. — John Oliver Copy Share Image
When you see people say crazy things on our show, they mean this stuff,and that's easy to forget: They're not joking. — John Oliver Copy Share Image
I think Americans still can't help but respond to the natural authority of this voice. Deep down they long to be told what to… — John Oliver Copy Share Image
I guess the tone of jokes is often, at best, irreverent, but it always comes from a place of deep love. — John Oliver Copy Share Image
I'm always interested in audience interaction. Not so much aggressive audience interaction - I'm genuinely interested in how people see things. — John Oliver Copy Share Image
I do one accent - my own. I can make it louder or quieter. That is the sum total of my vocal range. I… — John Oliver Copy Share Image
If you work on a comedy show, your basic form of communication is teasing. That's generally how we speak to each other: you communicate… — John Oliver Copy Share Image
Anybody who claims to be excited for April Fools' Day is probably a sociopath. — John Oliver Copy Share Image
