My point here, young couples, is that baby-having is extremely serious business, and you probably don't have the vaguest idea what you're… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
“I pulled the phone toward me and punched in the number of the sheriff's office in Flat Mesa. The deputy at the… — Allyson James Copy Share Image
I didn't understand how funny this play Much Ado About Nothing truly was until I became an English teacher and had to… — Dan Brown Copy Share Image
“You hunt and catch your own food. Am I correct?" "We are fierce predators of the night," DeChevue said proudly. Edwin tried… — Patrick E. McLean Copy Share Image
I would never believe it of you, my boy, regardless of the schemers your mother and sister turned out to be. You… — Julie Klassen Copy Share Image
“Dad leapt over the garden wall instead of going through the gate. Sadly he didn‘t do himself a severe injury, and so… — Louise Rennison Copy Share Image
At least one way of measuring the freedom of any society is the amount of comedy that is permitted, and clearly a… — Eric Idle Copy Share Image
“The wild women in his lap,' my father enthused, 'laying their breasts on his head.' There was a moment of stunned silence.… — Patrick Rothfuss Copy Share Image
I don't think I ever want to just leave comedy and become a straight dramatic actor. But if the opportunity comes, I… — Patti Harrison Copy Share Image
“As soon as we got back I ran upstairs and told everyone the story, thus telling everyone the alarm code, thus breaking… — Sarah Royal Copy Share Image
Humor has the tendency to be funny once. If I tell you a joke, we're going to have a big laugh. But… — Marcel Wanders Copy Share Image
“I've made up a song about the new Folks," he (Little Georgie)added eagerly. "Would you like to hear it?" Don't think I… — Robert Lawson Copy Share Image
“Sincere and unspiteful laughter is mirth, but where is there any mirth in our time, and do people know how to be… — Fyodor Dostoyevsky Copy Share Image
“One thing that I used to believe that has stuck with me is, of course, that farts are funny. Burps, too. Sneezes,… — Greg Knauss Copy Share Image
“I used to think Romeo and Juliet was the greatest love story ever written. But now that I’m middle-aged, I know better.… — J. Conrad Guest Copy Share Image
“Aye. 'Tis a free country." Monq had come to check on Elora just as she asked that question. "Well, that kind of… — Victoria Danann Copy Share Image
“That dung flop?” Nakita said, her dislike almost visibly dripping into nasty puddles at Amy’s designer flats. “Yes, I guess. That doesn’t… — Kim Harrison Copy Share Image
I always knew I wanted to make movies since I was around eleven. I never thought of it as wanting to do… — Jeff Baena Copy Share Image
“Hertzfeld recalled that Gates just sat there coolly, looking at Steve in the eye, before hurling back, in his squeaky voice, what… — Walter Isaacson Copy Share Image
“Orcs do not have enemies.” Monde tried to search for the proper term, “We have…adversaries.” “Isn’t that the same thing?” “Depends on… — Sabrina Zbasnik Copy Share Image
“Surely this marked a new level of achievement in his amatory career. Never before had he charmed the frock off a woman… — Tessa Dare Copy Share Image
“The answer to the question ‘How many children do you have?’ and the one to the question ‘How many children are you… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
“Manto's take on Ismat: "Ismat’s pen and tongue both run fast. When she starts writing, her ideas race ahead and the words… — Saadat Hasan Manto Copy Share Image
“Found naked with a few of his grandfather’s kitchen maids? His father’s claw right to the back of the head. Suggest that… — G.A. Aiken Copy Share Image
Every time I've done comedy in, like, traditional comedy clubs, there's always these comedians that do really well with audiences but that… — Aziz Ansari Copy Share Image
I think that's part of being a comedy writer. You have to be confident. If you're sitting around worrying about, like, oh… — David Mandel Copy Share Image
As for Tenacious D, of course it could work as a full length movie; all it requires is a great writer and… — David Cross Copy Share Image
“Brigan, could you attempt, at least, to make yourself presentable? I know this is a war, but the rest of us are… — Kristin Cashore Copy Share Image
I try to be careful not to put the cart before the horse. I try not to create comedy for other comedians… — Brian Regan Copy Share Image
I think the best comedic actors don't play it for comedy, they play it for reality. Then you find it funny because… — Zooey Deschanel Copy Share Image
“I fall short of her standards. She made me buy cat food that hasn't been tested on animals. My cats took one… — Paula Poundstone Copy Share Image
Philosophy is problem-solving. There's a philosophical problem, and then you try to solve it by approaching it from different angles and seeing… — Kumail Nanjiani Copy Share Image
I think that comedians, more than any other type of celebrity, have to keep their humour and keep their feet on the… — Jimmy Carr Copy Share Image
“Everyone has crap in their background, everyone has things they wish they could undo. But most people don't go around doing their… — Nicholas Sparks Copy Share Image
“Wisteria hangs over the eaves like clumps of ghostly grapes. Euphorbia's pale blooms billow like sea froth. Blood grass twists upward, knifing… — Zsuzsi Gartner Copy Share Image
“He lives near me so we do some things together.” His throat felt tight. “Well, lots of things, actually. But of course… — Clare London Copy Share Image
“You know there are a lot of different aspects to ourselves. It’s good to meet them, even engage them if we want… — Art Hochberg Copy Share Image
I find it discouraging - and a bit depressing - when I notice the unequal treatment afforded by the media to UFO… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
“I suffer from ADDAD… Attention Deficit Doing ANYTHING Disorder! It's where you set a goal to do certain things, then you start… — Comic Strip Mama Copy Share Image
I used to love, love Steve Martin. I still do... I would get these albums, and I would just listen to them… — Paul Rudd Copy Share Image
