The funny thing about the people I don't like - they're very self-centered. — Brendon Urie Copy Share Image
The biggest risk for this generation is to have a haircut from a new salon..!! — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Women are like Elephants. I like to watch them, but I wouldn't want to own one. — WC Fields Copy Share Image
The mere possibility provides no warrant for denying what I clearly grasp. — William Lane Craig Copy Share Image
When you really really want to slap someone do it...just make sure to say 'mosquito' when you do it — Shubham Joshi Copy Share Image
I came from a real tough neighborhood. On my street, the kids take hubcaps - from moving cars. — Rodney Dangerfield Copy Share Image
I had a bag of Fritos, they were Texas grilled Fritos. These Fritos had grill marks on them. They remind me of… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
“Stick your dick in’?” I asked, my brows probably touching. “Did you actually just say that?” “Make love. I meant make love… — Kylie Scott Copy Share Image
“I didn't want to spoil the mood. This was probably the longest Daemon and I had ever spoken without some statement earning… — Jennifer L. Armentrout Copy Share Image
The more popular a person thinks he is in the blogosphere, the thinner his skin and the thicker his hypocrisy. This should… — Guy Kawasaki Copy Share Image
So, I sit at the hotel at night and I think of something that's funny. Or, If the pen is too far… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
I can count on one hand the people who are legendary in my book, and Tom Waits is certainly right at the… — Steve Vai Copy Share Image
Sean is so funny. One time he went to Ireland for two weeks with his mother, and Ireland is so beautiful, and… — Megan Mullally Copy Share Image
It is great fun dying in the United States of America. It is great fun first of all for the undertakers who… — George Mikes Copy Share Image
