It's weird the way "finger puppet" sounds okay as a noun... ladies. — Demetri Martin Copy Share Image
You would never know if you could ever be, If you never try, you would never see. — Lupe Fiasco Copy Share Image
I was feeling very irritable. It was that difficult time of the month when the credit card statement arrives. — Julie Walters Copy Share Image
I think it's funny that people who treat you like sh*t get offended when you finally do the same to them. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Admit it, You've paired last names with your name to see if they sounded good together. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
That awkward moment when You find out your teacher is pregnant... its like, woah, you actually have a life? And a husband?… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If you did something in 'The Fast Show' that didn't work, you could always deliberately undermine it, or chop it into three… — Paul Whitehouse Copy Share Image
If a boy gives a love letter to a girl, people call him LOAFER But if a gal gives a letter 2a… — Sadie Copy Share Image
Even though I never worked with her, it was still really cool to have Brooke Shields on set. She was so nice… — Atticus Shaffer Copy Share Image
I started in theatre, moved into film and television, and started doing voice work, which is funny because after a long time… — Linda Cardellini Copy Share Image
I'll tell ya, I don't get no respect... The other day, I got back from a business trip. I got in a… — Rodney Dangerfield Copy Share Image
A crime persevered in a thousand centuries ceases to be a crime, and becomes a virtue. This is the law of custom,… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“Occasionally, a dog will be presented as some training method for having a baby. "My girlfriend and I got a dog. We… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
