Wedding dresses are white so the dishwasher will match the oven and the fridge. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
The hardest thing about losing your short term memory is… 'Happy Birthday' Yes it's someone's Happy Birthday isn't o_O — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Everything is forgivable if you leave after a one night stand, as long as you were good in bed. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Women love sex in the dark because they can't stand to see a man have a good time. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If you're told you only have six months to live, immediately get married. It will make those six months seem like eternity. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If you bleach your asshole and add ammonia... would you fart Mustard Gas? ' Asking for a Friend — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing - but it let out a little whine. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Woman Law: My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
The ones that learn by reading…… The few who learn by observation….. The rest of them have to pee on the electric… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If all woman in the world died today, human race would no longer possess the secret of how to properly wrap a… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
When I die I want my body to donate for research, but more specifically to a scientist who is working on bringing… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Ladies, If your man is telling, you are so cute & funny, Tell him you are on periods & see the PMS… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was a… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
When you thought I wasn't looking I learned most of life's lessons that I need to know to be a good and… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Not to brag but its women who always say 'SORRY' to me Like this women in bar last night said: SORRY Asshole,… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I was watching Gene Simmons' TV show, Family Jewels. Or as it's known in the business, 'The Osbournes' Without the Talented Father. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Sometimes I look at my awesome twitter followers & think to myself, What the hell would I do without them :) — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
I won't be tweeting this sunday. I have better things to do like bashing myself by following girls on streets. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
Men and women shop differently. Men know what they want before they see it. Women don't know what they want until they see it. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
I used to receive virtual smiles, sweet morning and night greetings. Now all I have is silence, and a blistered heart. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
Do girls really look at penises and say Wow, I can't wait to put that in my mouth? — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share