If your dad is anything like mine, then you have no clue what to buy him for Father's Day. The only Father's… — Michael Showalter Copy Share Image
Father's Day: When you get that lethal combination of alcohol and new power tools. — David Letterman Copy Share Image
"Reverence for parents" stands written among the three laws of most revered righteousness. — Aeschylus Copy Share Image
You can tell what was the best year of your father's life, because they seem to freeze that clothing style and ride… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
He's [Harry S. Truman] just your dad, and you love him. It's only when you grow up, and step back from him,… — Margaret Truman Daniel Copy Share Image
Fathers, like mothers, are not born. Men grow into fathers and fathering is a very important stage in their development. — David Gottesman Copy Share Image
My father confused me. From the ages of one to seven, I thought my name was Jesus Christ! — Spike Milligan Copy Share Image
There should be a children's song: 'If you're happy and you know it, keep it to yourself and let your dad sleep'. — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
My daughter got me a 'World's Best Dad' mug. So we know she's sarcastic. — Bob Odenkirk Copy Share Image
Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set… — Jimmy Piersall Copy Share Image
Father's Day is important because, besides being the day on which we honor Dad, it's the one day of the year that… — Jimmy Fallon Copy Share Image