Facebook status Quotes · Page 20

That awkward moment when you wave and smile at someone but they dont see you.

— Anonymous

Some people might as well post 'Wants Attention' as their Facebook status.

— Anonymous

Just always count your blessings, not your problems, troubles or mistakes!

— Mhaj

Pumpkin Spice Lattes are to college girls; what mini-shooters of whiskey are to alcoholics.

— Anonymous

I was going to look for my missing watch, but I could never find the time.

— Nikhil Saluja

You dont have to like me,am not a facebook status:p

— Justin Case

Oh, people can come up with statistics to prove anything. 14% of people know that.

— Nikhil Saluja

Dear Teacher. Please stop make us sleepy, we have no bed in class. Sincerely, students.

— OhItsVynn

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you make my fav cake for me, and I learned that the little things…

— Nikhil Saluja

The fellas be wanting a girl who plays video games, watch sports, has tattoos, and wear Jordan's. Sounds like you want a…

— Jason Santana

Did you know? Its impossible to say Good Eye Might without sounding Australian? LIKE if you tried :)

— Becca

Your pregnant is the only AprilFool joke you women got? Find a new joke cause that been played out years ago

— Deon Crockett

Like IF u AGREE that From a girls point of view, the guy always chooses the slut. From a guys point of…

— Anonymous

Have you ever wondered if those dollar bills in your wallet might have once been in a strippers butt? You're wondering now...

— Anonymous

I Am Me, I Like Being Me. And I Need Nobody To Make Me Somebody. I Don't Care If People Don't Like…

— Pacifiersucker

Girls who say Lots of guys want me should never forget that low prices attract the most customers.

— Emaliebaby

When you're putting on jeans with holes and your foot goes through the hole.

— Anonymous

What I do when I like someone: 1% - talk to them. 99% - stare. :p

— Anonymous

Never apologize for saying what you feel because that;s like saying Sorry for being real

— Anonymous

No, I didn't stalk you. It was on my news feed. Get over yourself.

— Tanya Bianco

Topaz is my birth stone. Tomb is my death stone.

— Nikhil Saluja

Don't be an asshole, don't be a jerk, be what you are and be proud of it.

— Jessica Wadia

Dont ever regret the things you did wrong. Regret the good things you did to the wrong people.

— Nate

To the world you may be someone, but to someone you may be the world.

— Nikhil Saluja

Dr: Are you sexually active? Me: Yes I'm a Facebook whore.

— Anonymous

Have much more than you can show and speak less than you know.

— Anonymous

When I sit down on a field, I automatically start pulling grass out of the ground.

— Anonymous

Oh woowww.. Im that invisible to you now??? Thats cool. Ive always wanted to have superpowers.

— Kand3n

Life Insurance: A contract that leaves you poor while you live so you can die rich.

— Nikhil Saluja

Two face people are like the penny so worthless no one wants them around any more.

— Zabi Khojazada

Sleeping comes so naturally to me, I could do it with my eyes closed.

— Nikhil Saluja

Between 3 and 80, Man is like North Korea: Ruled by nuts'

— Nikhil Saluja

That awkward moment when you trip, over nothing.

— Anonymous

You can't be a little bit unfaithful any more than you can be a little bit pregnant.

— Nikhil Saluja

They say you should never work with children or animals… Isn't that right, Rolf?

— Anonymous

Periods are ridiculous girls shouldnt be punished for not getting pregnant.

— Anonymous

When Im alone in my house, every sound is a ghost.

— Anonymous

Need an ark to save two of every animal? I noah guy.

— Nikhil Saluja

When sex started becoming easier to get, love started becoming harder to find.

— Anonymous

IPhone covers are like condoms; you don't want to, but you kind of have to.

— Anonymous