If you want sex, have an affair. If you want a relationship, buy a dog. — Julie Burchill Copy Share Image
As a precocious teen I dreamed of being Graham Greene. Well, as it turned out, I never wrote a great novel, sadly, and I… — Julie Burchill Copy Share Image
Being a child is horrible. It is slightly better than being a tree or a piece of heavy machinery but not half as good… — Julie Burchill Copy Share Image
People - and I include myself - get fat because they choose pleasure over self-denial. — Julie Burchill Copy Share Image
In my third husband I had discovered a blissfully laid-back type who thought it nothing less than hilarious when I misread the map on… — Julie Burchill Copy Share Image
I believe, literally, in the God of the Old Testament, whom I understand as the Lord of the Jews and the Protestants. I'm a… — Julie Burchill Copy Share Image
A cynic should never marry an idealist. For the cynic, marriage represents the welcome end of romantic life, with all its agony and ecstasy.… — Julie Burchill Copy Share Image
Surely being a Professional Beauty - let alone an ageing one - is one of the most insecure and doomed careers imaginable. — Julie Burchill Copy Share Image
Can I just say here how much I hate the word 'pamper'? While pretending to celebrate and indulge women, it actually implies that their… — Julie Burchill Copy Share Image
May I just single out for salutations, on the "anti-war" side: Pop Stars For Appeasement, Dancers Against Democracy, Actors For Apathy, Fashionistas For Fascism… — Julie Burchill Copy Share Image
From paying off friends' tax bills to rescuing stray dogs and stuffing £20 notes into the hands of homeless people, I can't get rid… — Julie Burchill Copy Share Image
Nicole Kidman in particular seems to bring out the butt-kisser in the sassiest of hackettes, as they ceaselessly strive to portray her as some… — Julie Burchill Copy Share Image
