Through words we come to know the other person--and to be known. This knowing is at the heart of our deepest longings for intimacy and connection with others. How relationships unfold with the most important people in our lives depends… — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
While women once acquired relationship skills to "hook," "snare," or "catch" a husband who would provide access to economic security and social status, the position of contemporary women has not changed that radically. Much of our success still depends on… — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
“Letting go of anger and hate requires us to give up the hope for a different past, along with the hope of a fantasized… — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
“There’s a widespread belief that if you have solid self-esteem you don’t need outside affirmation and praise. This is patently untrue, by the way.” — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
It is an act of courage to acknowledge our own uncertainty and sit with it for a while. — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
Nothing you say can ensure that the other person will get it, or respond the way you want. You may never exceed his threshold… — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
If you exchanged wedding vows, tape them to your bathroom mirror and read them aloud to yourself every morning along with the ritual brushing… — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
Kids want nothing more than for all the important adults in their life to get along. — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
“People's sense of self worth is pivotal to their ability to look clearly at the hurt they've caused. The more solid one's sense of… — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
Being able to make a sincere apology - one that says, "Yes, I get it; I screwed up. Your feelings make sense, and I'm… — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
“Everyone freaks out. Sometimes the best we can do with fear is befriend it. Expect it and understand that fear will always reappear. Eventually… — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
The bolder and more courageous you are, the more you will learn about yourself. — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
Underground issues from one relationship or context invariably fuel our fires in another. — Harriet Lerner Copy Share Image
