As you get older, subconsciously you start thinking about mortality and protecting your offspring. It opens up a whole new avenue of life experiences. — Kevin Nealon Copy Share Image
They say that moving is one of the most stressful things in life. Death in the family is the second most stressful, and moving your dead spouse is the third. — Kevin Nealon Copy Share Image
I learned how to draw from being bored in school. I would doodle on the margins of my paper — Kevin Nealon Copy Share Image
I'd been doing some light-beer commercials for Budweiser and Coors, and I was doing stand-up comedy. I wanted to get into the acting world,… — Kevin Nealon Copy Share Image
I think people really appreciate clever commercials, as do I. I think they're very entertaining. You just have to wade through all the garbage.… — Kevin Nealon Copy Share Image
If you want a transcript of tonight's program, get a pen and write down everything I said. — Kevin Nealon Copy Share Image
I really like to read when I'm eating - 'The New York Times' or the 'Wall Street Journal,' paper version. — Kevin Nealon Copy Share Image
I've noticed a surge when I go out somewhere, or if I'm doing stand-up. — Kevin Nealon Copy Share Image
I play a lot of sports. I'm not real good at any of them. I'm above adequate. — Kevin Nealon Copy Share Image
When I first began doing TV pilots, my expectations were high. I didn't understand that world. So when 'Weeds' took off, I was so… — Kevin Nealon Copy Share Image
As a comedian, you're kind of like a blues musician; you have to live a little bit. — Kevin Nealon Copy Share Image
Roxanne came along in '86, when I was doing a lot of stand-up. I auditioned for the movie, and of course I was a… — Kevin Nealon Copy Share Image
I became a vegetarian after I became aware of factory farming and slaughterhouses and the torture and inhumane handling of all these animals. — Kevin Nealon Copy Share Image
I have a severe addiction to 'Angry Birds.' I always tell myself, 'One more game...' But then there's always another and another and another. — Kevin Nealon Copy Share Image
