A conservative, a liberal, and a moderate walk into a bar. The bartender says, 'Hi, Mitt.' — Foster Friess Copy Share Image
“H.A.P.P.Y How are people playing you? My Hand, three of a kind. Today I fold. bartender another drink please... make that a… — Jevon Scott Copy Share Image
A good writer is not, per se, a good book critic. No more so than a good drunk is automatically a good… — Jim Bishop Copy Share Image
Will there be any bartenders up there in Heaven, will the pubs never close? — Richard Thompson Copy Share Image
My dad was a bartender that worked banquets. So that meant holidays, weekends, nights. — Marco Rubio Copy Share Image
“in there," and the first guy says, "Watch." In he goes and orders a beer. "Sorry, you can't bring your dog in… — Various Copy Share Image
A naked blonde walks into a bar with a poodle under one arm and a 6 pack of beer under the other.… — Author Name Copy Share Image
He had a habit of remarking to bartenders that he didn't see any sense in mixing whiskey with water since the whiskey… — Joseph Mitchell Copy Share Image
“So I think to myself,” the bartender said, reaching back toward the glassware by the mirror, “you’re here for something. The Butcher… — James S.A. Corey Copy Share Image
They made it to the middle class, my dad working as a bartender and my mother as a cashier and a maid.… — Marco Rubio Copy Share Image
I did lie once to get a job as a bartender. I said I had two years' experience making drinks, when really,… — Inbar Lavi Copy Share Image
“Once again, Rylann tried to catch the eye of the female bartender working Firelight’s main bar. “One of the few times I’ve… — Julie James Copy Share Image
John Boehner is a member of a country club in Ohio. It turns out that the bartender was plotting to poison Boehner.… — David Letterman Copy Share Image
I'm a bartender. I like recipes. They're concretes. Was the drink recipe for seduction one shot charm and two shots self-deception, shaken,… — Karen Marie Moning Copy Share Image
“I was not a face. I was tired of being called pretty. I was tired of people seeing my potential. I could… — Tarryn Fisher Copy Share Image
I feel lucky. I do love it, mostly. At college I had it in my heart that I wanted to be a… — Lauren Groff Copy Share Image
I was in Athens for a football match when 9/11 went down, and it was quite spectacular - we went into this… — Irvine Welsh Copy Share Image
I think they [TV productions] were just kind of drying up. I'd done a couple of episodes, but nothing was happening. So… — Eric McCormack Copy Share Image
The bartenders are the regular band of Jack, and the heavenly drummer who looks up to the sky with blue eyes, with… — Jack Kerouac Copy Share Image
“Club" replies the seal. ♦◊♦◊♦◊♦ A bartender walks into a church, a temple and a mosque. He has no idea how jokes… — Various Copy Share Image
“So, why'd you come back?" " I'm going to kill some people," I tell him. I pour the Jack into the coffee.… — Richard Kadrey Copy Share Image
Tobin," Mom said disapprovingly. She wasn't a particularly funny person. It suited her professionally - I mean, you don't want your cancer… — John Green Copy Share Image
A man walks into a bar and orders one shot. Then he looks into his shirt pocket and orders another shot. After… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“I'll work with her." For now. Then he gave Z a steady look and drew his line in the sand. "You are… — Cherise Sinclair Copy Share Image
“The place smelled of piss and mildew and stale beer. There was something else, too: the acrid sweat of the strung out—a… — Erik Storey Copy Share Image
“The whiskey was a good start. I got the idea from Dylan Thomas. He's this poet who drank twenty-one straight whiskeys at… — Michael Thomas Ford Copy Share Image
“order a bottle of wine, drink a toast to his wife’s pregnancy, and forget all about Jackson for a few hours. Instead,… — A.J. Davidson Copy Share Image
There's a bar on top of a really, really high building and it's very windy outside, so it is swaying back and… — SUPERMAN Copy Share Image
At a time when the respectable bourgeois youngsters of my generation were college freshmen, oppressed by simian sophomores and affronted with balderdash… — H. L. Mencken Copy Share Image
“Nick implied the job pays crap, so they can’t expect me to be some sort of art professor, right?” She paused when… — Judith Arnold Copy Share Image
“A dingy emblem on the door depicted a little boy peeing into a pot. The rest of the bar was equally drab… — Robert Liparulo Copy Share Image
Hell, if I didn't do stunts, I'd have had to be a bartender, or something else that didn't pay well. — Hal Needham Copy Share Image
“bartender walks into a church, a temple and a mosque. He has no idea how jokes” — Various Copy Share Image
Set up another case bartender! The best thing for a case of nerves is a case of Scotch. — W. C. Fields Copy Share Image
I was an amazing bartender and a great waiter. I think, in a way, that was my acting school. — Nick Frost Copy Share Image
You're going to be embarrassed when you realize I'm Wilmer Valderama. -Ben Stone [to bartender] — Knocked Up (The Movie Copy Share Image
A cocktail can be made by the bartender. But the cocktail also can be made by the chef. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
![“I think they [TV productions] were just kind of drying up. I'd done a couple of episodes, but nothing was happening. So I went to Vancouver to visit a buddy and see what was going on, and that year was crazy. Vancouver was on fire at that point. It was all these Stephen J. Cannell productions…” quote by Eric McCormack](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/247/eric-mccormack-2915_bartender_i-think-they-tv-productions-were-just-ki_2247802.jpg)
![“You're going to be embarrassed when you realize I'm Wilmer Valderama. -Ben Stone [to bartender]” quote by Knocked Up (The Movie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e08/knocked-up-the-movie-21594_quote_you-re-going-to-be-embarrassed-when-you_977947.jpg)
