The only thing I can do is wipe my arse, brush my teeth, turn up and do the best work I can. — Tom Hardy Copy Share Image
There’s no way I’m going to put myself through Sandhurst and then sit on my arse back home while my boys are… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Yeah, arrest that man on the crime of having 8 Chicken McNuggets stuck up his arse. — Dwayne Johnson Copy Share Image
If I could dance like the ladies can, it would have been my arse on your screens. — Lily Allen Copy Share Image
I'm a big fan of the Mars Bar Diet. You don't eat the Mars bar, you stick it up your arse and… — Billy Connolly Copy Share Image
To plunder, to lie, to show your arse, are three essentials for climbing high. — Aristophanes Copy Share Image
It's interesting to see the dislocation between how people perceive a person visually. Apparently on the radio I'm blonde with a big… — Tamsin Greig Copy Share Image
I always try to remember that praise and a slap on your back is only 6 inches away from a kick up… — Anthony Foley Copy Share Image
Everyone thinks I'm a smart arse who can solve any bloody problem. I'm not. I'm just a very old businessman and a… — John Harvey-Jones Copy Share Image
Even the most Bush-happy, flag suckling jack-arse knows deep-down inside that something is wrong. America is over and everyone knows it. The… — Jello Biafra Copy Share Image
Yeah loads of bruises and welts, usually around the hip, arse, thigh region and elbows. Elbows got knocked up big time, but… — Colin Farrell Copy Share Image
Every writer has to make an emotional journey from artist sitting in attic to being part of a business. The writer of… — Julian Fellowes Copy Share Image
All anyone really needs to know about barbed wire is that it can tear the arse out of your trousers, give a… — Billy Connolly Copy Share Image
When its comes to music and books 'OK' is not good enough. We need creative work that floors us! That we can't… — Sean Michael Wilson Copy Share Image
Who was it recently invented some machine that will enable her to sign a book from 5,000 miles away? Margaret Atwood. Get… — Nicholas Royle Copy Share Image
I'd like to think that I'd helped people all over the world to question the things they otherwise would have accepted as… — Marilyn Manson Copy Share Image
A famous bon mot asserts that opinions are like arse-holes, in that everyone has one. There is great wisdom in this... but… — Tim Minchin Copy Share Image
I'll tell you what pressure is. Pressure is a Messerschmitt up your arse. Playing cricket is not. — Keith Miller Copy Share Image
I've been a poser for f--ing years. I say, pose your arse off. You know, have a laugh. — Billy Connolly Copy Share Image
There are two things you can be certain of: dying and getting the arse as a football coach. — Royce Hart Copy Share Image
Whoever designed this frigging map was having a laugh. Just around the corner, my arse. — Freya Stark Copy Share Image
The word arse is as much god as the word face. It must be so, otherwise you cut off your god at… — D. H. Lawrence Copy Share Image
I am struck by the way people behave on the Tube. They look at each other beadily and inquisitively, and something goes… — Graham Swift Copy Share Image
The shrill voices of those who give orders Are full of fear like the squeakings of Piglets awaiting the butcher's knife, as… — Bertolt Brecht Copy Share Image
It's no go the picture palace, it's no go the stadium, It's no go the country cot with a pot of pink… — Louis MacNeice Copy Share Image
I worked in Harrods as a sales girl and I was so lazy, I just sat on my arse all day. Now… — Susannah Constantine Copy Share Image
If you want to get on in life get off your arse because it ain't going to come to you. And if… — Ray Winstone Copy Share Image
We need to get past the point where being black and a male means that I am likely to mug you for… — John Amaechi Copy Share Image
When you look at pornography, the women become objects, whereas what I'm trying to do is make the person in the photograph… — Rankin Copy Share Image
A Duke couldn't have the arse hanging out of his trousers when meeting foreign diplomats. Actually even plain old Sam Vimes never… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
I do ride a bicycle occasionally, but not those stupid stationary ones you see in gyms. I do have one of those,… — Christine McVie Copy Share Image
But big people’s illnesses are always made to sound big. The simple shutting and opening of the royal arse-hole was made to… — Khushwant Singh Copy Share Image
Is man a savage at heart, skinned o'er with fragile Manners? Or is savagery but a faint taint in the natural man's… — John Barth Copy Share Image
Lucy: I don't understand men. Nettie: What is there to understand? If you feed 'em regular-like and give 'em a bit of… — Sabrina Jeffries Copy Share Image
People who got on their feet and freaked about were called idiot dancers. and nobody wants to be called an idiot dancer.… — Steve Marriott Copy Share Image
I've played hockey most my life and I've never been badly injured...Three weeks into curling I've got bone chips in both my… — James Allodi Copy Share Image
