Janet Evanovich

I'm a real voyeur.

— Janet Evanovich

“Bitch, this is a gun...”

— Janet Evanovich

“Thank God for small favors.”

— Janet Evanovich

You're such a cupcake.

— Janet Evanovich

“ONE FOR THE MONEY”

— Janet Evanovich

“bottles of water on it to keep”

— Janet Evanovich

“It wasn't my fault.”

— Janet Evanovich

“Stephanie Plum, psycho bait.”

— Janet Evanovich

With the exception of dessert, food is food.

— Janet Evanovich

“carton and sleep in my bed.” “Maybe I can arrest him for”

— Janet Evanovich

“Yeah. My skill level is so high I do things I don’t even try to do.”

— Janet Evanovich

'It's been almost a month since you found a body. I knew you were due.'

— Janet Evanovich

“May misfortune follow us the rest of our lives, but never catch up.”

— Janet Evanovich

Kiss those cuffs good-bye." Lula from "Hard Eight" By Janet Evonavich

— Janet Evanovich

Sweetie, nothing that flies looks safe, including birds.

— Janet Evanovich

“You're scared now, I can smell it..." Benito Ramirez”

— Janet Evanovich

Omigod,' I said on a sudden flash of sleep-deprived insight. 'You're the big bad wolf.' There are some similarities.

— Janet Evanovich

“Oscar Wilde said it's never the question that's indiscreet, only the answers.”

— Janet Evanovich

“Your monkey was looking under the stall doors in the ladies' room,' I told Diesel. 'That's my boy,' Diesel said.”

— Janet Evanovich

What are you doing back at the bakery?” I asked [Diesel]. “Did you know Wulf was here?” “No. I knew food was…

— Janet Evanovich

“carried me into the bedroom and tossed me onto the bed. “Five minutes,” he said, lacing his shoes.”

— Janet Evanovich

Kate O'Hare is a former SEAL and is currently in the FBI - we know that there are no women in the…

— Janet Evanovich

“So why’d you part ways with this Dickie Orr person?” Lula asked. “He’s a jerk.” “Good enough for me,” she said. “I…

— Janet Evanovich

I wasn't sure exactly how prostitutes determined price, but if men bought hookers by the pound, these two would be doing okay.

— Janet Evanovich

“Babe, you’ve destroyed a car, burned down two buildings, stapled a guy’s nuts, and you have sixteen stitches in your leg. Take…

— Janet Evanovich

“Diesel sucked air. "You keep fondling me like that, and I might have to marry you." "I'm not fondling you. I'm looking…

— Janet Evanovich

“I slipped the acres of pink taffeta over my head and struggled to get it zipped. What had originally been a dress…

— Janet Evanovich

Any intelligent woman would have made a dignified retreat, but this was New Jersey, where dignity always runs a poor second to…

— Janet Evanovich

Do you have someone watching her house?” (Stephanie) “That kind of surveillance only happens in the movies. We’re so underbudgeted we’re one…

— Janet Evanovich

My grandmother is a little Cuban woman who cooks all day and speaks Spanish. Your grandmother watches pay-per-view porn." "She used to…

— Janet Evanovich

I’ll be real discreet,” Tank said. As discreet as a six-foot-six, no-neck guy weighing three hundred and fifty pounds, all dressed in…

— Janet Evanovich

Everyone knows you can't see death cooties. Take my word for it, that couch has the biggest, fattest death cooties that ever…

— Janet Evanovich

Ranger is an unusual name," she managed. "Is it a nickname?" It's a street name," Ranger said. "I was a Ranger in…

— Janet Evanovich

“Pbbtlt. "It smells like ham, Glo said. It must be Hatchet" Hatchet moved out of the shadows. "My intent was to capture…

— Janet Evanovich

A uniform cordoned off the area with crime scene tape. The M.E. pulled in and parked. There were two EMT trucks idling…

— Janet Evanovich

“I’ll have one of my men drop a car off for you.” “Thanks. I’ll try not to lose it.” “If you can…

— Janet Evanovich

“I trudged down the stairs and stood on the sidewalk examining my car. Deep scratch in the roof from a misplaced bullet.…

— Janet Evanovich

“For the most part, Ranger had a consistent personality. He wasn't a guy who wasted a lot of unnecessary energy and effort.…

— Janet Evanovich

“I checked my pocketbook to make sure I had the essentials... beeper, tissues, hair spray, flashlight, cuffs, lipstick, gun with bullets, recharged…

— Janet Evanovich

“I was completely out of clean clothes. That meant I could be a slut and sleep naked , or I could be…

— Janet Evanovich