The hottest new attraction at Disney World has got to be the new Last Airbender ride. — Andrew Shaffer Attraction Copy Share Image
Biden is actually a wonk at heart. Despite his gaffes, he's very cerebral. — Andrew Shaffer Copy Share Image
Everybody has a breaking point. It's tough to ignore the impulse to respond with anger. — Andrew Shaffer Anger Copy Share Image
“We do have funerals for the living," Jill said. "They're called birthday parties.” — Andrew Shaffer Birthday Copy Share Image
Chicago is a city built on architecture, and there are plenty of buildings to scale. — Andrew Shaffer Architecture Copy Share Image
Christmas sits like a black hole on the calendar. Just try scheduling a meeting at work the month of December. — Andrew Shaffer Black hole Copy Share Image
I was under the impression that if you've read one vampire series for young adults, you've read them all. — Andrew Shaffer Books Copy Share Image
Universal Orlando may have the new Harry Potter Wizarding World, but Disney World has the Hari Puttar Experience, based on the Bollywood… — Andrew Shaffer Comedy Copy Share Image
I catch Filter in Des Moines doing their soundcheck at a small club. After tearing through a few songs, they spend nearly… — Andrew Shaffer Copy Share Image
“Most times, my mind is just an ongoing, present-tense, first-person monologue. It's like I'm writing a novel, constantly, but only in my… — Andrew Shaffer Monologue Copy Share Image
Visibility is one of the most difficult parts of the self-publishing equation. No matter how great your book is, it is fighting… — Andrew Shaffer Books Copy Share Image
“No man is an island,” he says. “Islands are made of dirt and rocks and trees. I don’t know any people made… — Andrew Shaffer Island Copy Share Image
“The receptionist laughs. “Relax. It just means you’re a first-time visitor here at Gray Holdings.” — Andrew Shaffer Copy Share Image
“I like my tea like I like my men,” I say. With the last name “Grey.” But I realize that’s too forward,… — Andrew Shaffer Coffee Copy Share Image
This is a common misconception about antidepressants: many people believe they're simply 'happy pills' that will wipe a person's emotional slate clean.… — Andrew Shaffer Copy Share Image
If you're looking for a behind-the-scenes rock-n-roll biography, pick up Nikki Sixx's 'The Heroin Diaries'. If you want the world's most narcissistic… — Andrew Shaffer First step Copy Share Image
Celebrating Christmas without subscribing to Christianity is like watching the Super Bowl without watching a regular season game. Some people watch the… — Andrew Shaffer Christianity Copy Share Image
'Anthems' was a harsh indictment of American foreign policy; the video for the first single featured an American flag engulfed in a… — Andrew Shaffer Copy Share Image
In the White House, Obama was driven around in an armored Cadillac limo nicknamed 'The Beast.' In 'Hope Never Dies,' he blows… — Andrew Shaffer Copy Share Image
“ Stop it, girl. There’s no way he’s five-years-old. Or one hundred. He’s probably like every other CEO on the planet: Late… — Andrew Shaffer Humor Copy Share Image
“As I brush my long, brown hair, the girl in the mirror with blue eyes too big for her head stares back… — Andrew Shaffer Copy Share Image
“My shift isn’t over until six,” I say glumly. “Hold on,” he says. He pulls a Blackberry from his coat pocket and… — Andrew Shaffer Boss Copy Share Image
“I arrive at the Gray Holdings headquarters in downtown Seattle two hours later. The building is a ginormous 175-story office building that… — Andrew Shaffer Engineering Copy Share Image
“I growl with frustration at my reflection in the mirror. Damn my hair – it’s fifty shades of fucked up. The situation… — Andrew Shaffer Copy Share Image
“For the first time since he showed up in my checkout lane, I let my eyes wander the full length of his… — Andrew Shaffer Copy Share Image
“The people are so small, they look like ants (although they're Walmart customers, so they look like obese ants).” — Andrew Shaffer Copy Share Image
With traditional publishing, books might be pulled due to plagiarism or libel - but rarely for content, and especially not without a… — Andrew Shaffer Books Copy Share Image
“Who is this man I’m supposed to interview, this man whose last name is the same as the color of my sweatpants?… — Andrew Shaffer Humor Copy Share Image
“The building is a ginormous 175-story office building that juts into the sky like a glass and steel erection.” — Andrew Shaffer Copy Share Image
Way before musicians and actors cornered the market on misbehavior, writers were flooding hotel rooms and testing their livers' upper limits. — Andrew Shaffer Hotel Copy Share Image
“Most times, my mind is just an ongoing, present-tense, first-person monologue. It's like I'm writing a novel.” — Andrew Shaffer Monologue Copy Share Image
After finishing my undergraduate work at the University of Iowa, where I took creative writing classes taught by Writer's Workshop students, I… — Andrew Shaffer Creative writing Copy Share Image
If you're reading a mystery novel, you kind of want the character to solve the crime instead of completely bumble their way… — Andrew Shaffer Books Copy Share Image
The higher a book's sales ranks, the better chances it has of being noticed by Amazon's internal recommendations engine. — Andrew Shaffer Being Copy Share Image
'First Step 2 Forever' is a hardcover, multi-colored monstrosity that clocks in at 240 pages... half of which feature full-page pictures of… — Andrew Shaffer First step Copy Share Image
“I shake his hand, and feel the jolt of electricity again from him. He laughs and raises his hand to show me… — Andrew Shaffer Copy Share Image
“He hands me his shopping list and I lead him through the store in search of the items. Duct tape? Plastic wrap?… — Andrew Shaffer Copy Share Image
Treat haters in your online spaces just the same as you would in the real world. If they're not respectful to you… — Andrew Shaffer Haters Copy Share Image
It was a struggle to humanize Donald Trump, who was the antagonist in my satirical thriller 'The Day of the Donald'. Of… — Andrew Shaffer Day Copy Share Image
