Dentist: This will only hurt a little. Me: *LIAR!*

The higher animals get their teeth without pain or inconvenience. Man gets his through months and months of cruel torture; he will never get…

— Mark Twain

At first I thought, if I were Superman, a perfect secret identity would be "Clark Kent, Dentist," because you could save money on tooth…

— Jack Handey

“Are your kids afraid of the Dentist?”

— Rhonda Patton

Gauguin flew into a frenzy! He held my head under the X-ray machine for ten straight minutes and for several hours after I could…

— Woody Allen

Dentists tell you not to pick your teeth with any sharp metal object. Then you sit in their chair and the first thing they…

— Bill Cosby

Trips to the dentist - I like to postpone that kind of thing.

— Johnny Depp

I'm like the guy who prepares your taxes or a dentist. I'm very conservative and boring in a lot of ways.

— Augusten Burroughs

My therapist was like, 'What brings joy to your heart?' And I was like, 'I like to see teeth. I guess maybe I should…

— Tiffany Haddish

You can't escape history, or the needs and neuroses you've picked up like layers and layers of tartar on your teeth… Your every past…

— Anonymous

Men hang out their signs indicative of their respective trades; shoe makers hang out a gigantic shoe; jewelers a monster watch, and the dentist…

— Daniel Webster

Dentistry was an ego trip, and acting is a personal need. Usually it's the reverse, and I honestly don't think I had the talent…

— Larry Wilcox

So I went to the dentist. He said Say Aaah. I said Why? He said My dog's died.'

— Anonymous

A man loses his illusions first, his teeth second, and his follies last.

— Helen Rowland

There are three proven rules for good teeth: brush after every meal; see your dentist twice a year; and mind your own business.

— Henry Boyd

I wonder if there's such a thing as a spiritual dentist? I think my whole personality is full of cavities!

— Charles M. Schulz