There are two instruments worse than a clarinet - two…

Clarinet n. An instrument of torture operated by a person with cotton in his ears. There are two instruments worse than a clarinet –…

— Ambrose Bierce

I've always liked using flutes and clarinets. Any time I can use those, I'm really happy.

— A.C. Newman

Clarinets, like lawyers, have cases, mouthpieces, and they need a constant supply of hot air in order to function.

— Victor Borge

Notes, usually to be musical, have to move in or out. They don't sound like clarinets!

— Ray Still

“I turned to the clarinets. They were a resourceful lot.”

— Jennifer Echols

The clarinet is a musical instrument the only thing worse than which is two.

— Ambrose Bierce

So the ideology was that: use sounds as instruments, as sounds on tape, without the causality. It was no longer a clarinet or a…

— Luc Ferrari

Yeah, musically, from a production standpoint my favorite is probably 'Have a Little Talk with Jesus'. Just the way it turned out production wise…

— Bart Millard

I began with dance, doing ballet at 3, then tap, jazz, modern. Then I sang in church choirs, learned how to play clarinet and…

— Samantha Barks

Ted Lewis could make the clarinet talk. What it said was put me back in the case!

— Eddie Condon

“Heath holds the door to the band room open for me, and I get to my chair without falling, snapping together my clarinet and…

— Mindy McGinnis

My eyes are too big, my nose is too flat, my ears stick out, my mouth is too big and my face is too…

— Goldie Hawn

The oboe sounds like a clarinet with a cold.

— Victor Borge

We decided to do some of Merle's things with modern instrumentation. We used a flute, a bass clarinet, a trumpet, a clarinet, drums, a…

— Tennessee Ernie Ford

I started off playing the clarinet, after I was inspired by listening to my dad's Benny Goodman records.

— Alvin Lee