I figure if the kids are alive at the end of the day, I've done my job. — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
I have great parents, and they both taught me great things, but my formative years were boundaryless. — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
“I figure when my husband comes home from work, if the kids are still alive, then I've done my job.” — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
There's a lot more to being a woman than being a mother, but there's a hell a lot more to being a… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
TV family sitcoms have always been about fathers who know best and mothers who are so enchanted with everything they do. I… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
The only options open for girls then were of course mother, secretary or teacher. At least that's what we all thought and… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
my parents ... had decided early on that all of the problems in my family had somehow to do with me. All… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
I want to say that nobody accuses their parents of abusing them without justification to do that. I didn't just make it… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share Image
I had left home (like all Jewish girls) in order to eat pork and take birth control pills. When I first shared an intimate… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share
Pot enables you to think clearly without any fear or any limits. It's a mind-expander, which is part of why it's illegal and why… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share
My dad taught me swears when I was a toddler, and I saw, at a really early age, that if I shocked people, I… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share
I always was a writer, but then I wanted to do stand-up because I thought that was a way that I could perform what… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share
I thank God for creating gay men. Because if it wasn't for them, us fat women would have no one to dance with. — Roseanne Barr Copy Share
“I consider myself to be apretty good judge of people...That's why I don't like any of them.” — Roseanne Barr Copy Share
Sometimes for me not throwing a tantrum is what running a marathon or swimming the English Channel must be like for others of a… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share
Here is my personal opinion about prostitution. If men knew how to do it, they wouldn't have to pay for it. — Roseanne Barr Copy Share
Finding a calm place inside myself through meditation kind of helped me to get over a lot of mental illness ... it's just been… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share
Part of my platform is, of course, the guilty must be punished and that we no longer let our children see their guilty leaders… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share
Everyone in America (according to my generalizations) is a potential millionaire waiting for his or her big break. I was astonished lately to realize… — Roseanne Barr Copy Share
You can always get better. Nobody can stop you from getting better, and nobody can stop you from trying to make something right. — Roseanne Barr Copy Share
