My mother-in-law must be the probation officer I got for the crime I committed of marrying my husband. — Phyllis Diller Copy Share Image
It's not that we didn't get along, it's just that my mother-in-law is very objective. She objected to everything I did. — Beverly D'Angelo Copy Share Image
Having a great mother in law that you get along with and you KNOW she likes you will motivate you to never… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
When I get married I want a mother in law that will adore me and one that I'll actually like. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Just because you're unemployed doesn't mean you're not doing anything useful. You are, for example, at least keeping your mother-in-law's wit sharp. — Marilyn vos Savant Copy Share Image
My mother-in-law was with me during all four of my births and when she was sitting next to me holding my hand… — Patricia Heaton Copy Share Image
We never make sport of religion, politics, race or mothers. A mother never gets hit with a custard pie. Mothers-in-law-yes. But mothers-never. — Mack Sennett Copy Share Image
I suppose, mother-in-laws are frightening figures. Especially, more so for mother-in-laws to be. — Sonia Gandhi Copy Share Image
Dealing with in-laws is like walking down a dark hallway with a bucket of industrial-strength glue sitting in the shadows. If you're… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“It's funny. I thought she'd live through anything." Charlie said, "Me too. I figured even if there was a nuclear war, it… — Neil Gaiman Copy Share Image
“You see what your mother-in-law hasn’t yet realised is that she’s the one who needs to hold out the olive branch, not… — Karl Wiggins Copy Share Image
“I was thinking of murder, mutilation and dessert like Ignacia Sandoval’s instructions for delectable empanadas made of minced mother-in-law’s tongue (said to… — Sandra Ramos O'Briant Copy Share Image
Barack Obama said he may negotiate with the Taliban. A lot of people are saying okay, but be careful. But I said… — David Letterman Copy Share Image
I don't think I'd like Manhattan anymore. My mother-in-law lives there, and you go there. But I like looking at it from… — Martin Amis Copy Share Image
If someone should ask, "how should an Opposition function?" the best answer would be, "in the manner of a traditional mother-in-law who… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Surely,' I said, 'you don't think that you are going to die because you dreamed you saw your old father; if one… — H. Rider Haggard Copy Share Image
To have one's mother-in-law in the country when one lives in Paris, and vice versa, is one of those strokes of luck… — Honore de Balzac Copy Share Image
I should, many a good day, have blown my brains out, but for the recollection that it would have given pleasure to… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in mother in law, they come out as Woman Hitler? Coincidence? I… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
They (mothers-in-law) never leave when they say they will. When my mother-in-law visits, the mice throw themselves at the cat, begging to… — Lisa Kleypas Copy Share Image
a mother-in-law's praise says more in a woman's favor than anything else in the world. — Caroline Pafford Miller Copy Share Image
Everything has its drawbacks, as the man said when his mother-in-law died, and they came down upon him for the funeral expenses. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I can always tell when the mother in law's coming to stay; the mice throw themselves on the traps. — Les Dawson Copy Share Image
But I understand that relationship; I understand how the mother-in-law, daughter-in-law relationship has so many conflicts because it's so forced. — Wanda Sykes Copy Share Image
You know what's great about having an imaginary girlfriend? Imaginary mother-in-law! — Anonymous Copy Share Image
A bride who is bullied by her mother-in-law will herself become a bad mother-in-law. — Sin-Itiro Tomonaga Copy Share Image
“I’m creating a self help show called Self Talk. I’ll insult myself for an hour then open phone lines to a fitness… — Ryan Lilly Copy Share Image
I bought my mother-in-law a beautiful chair for Christmas, but she won't let me plug it in. — Milton Berle Copy Share Image
I have no problem putting my feet up and watching football but my mother-in-law is always doing stuff. — Seal Copy Share Image
Maybe I shouldn’t mouth off to the elemental I kinda hoped was my future mother-in-law. — Kiersten White Copy Share Image
My mother-in-law had a pain beneath her left breast. Turned out to be a trick knee. — Phyllis Diller Copy Share Image
Personally, I wear a lot of my mother-in-law's chiffons and my mother's silk. But when I buy saris for myself, then they… — Sonali Bendre Copy Share Image
Pakistan is the sort of place every man should send his mother-in-law, for a month, with all expenses paid. — Ian Botham Copy Share Image
