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Facebook status Quotes by Anonymous

877 Facebook status quotes by Anonymous

All Facebook status quotes Anonymous’s page

A ketchup bottle that farts can make anyone laugh, no matter the age. The quotes mix silly animal jokes, like plants shouting when a giraffe eats them, with complaints about Facebook stalkers and exaggerated dating metaphors. Some even imagine a law that lets students leave class if the professor is late.

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SO TUREEE :D

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Waffles are just pancakes with syrup traps...

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Reading old texts from you make u smile.

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2 things a girl wants: 1) Lose weight. 2) Eat.

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You're so fake, Barbie's jealous

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You'll have to speak up... I'm wearing a towel.

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Dear MTV, I'm a teen virgin. Where's my show?

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16 & Pregnant? How about 18 and graduated.

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Bitches love having a gay friend.

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When sex started becoming easier to get, love started becoming harder to find.

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When Im alone in my house, every sound is a ghost.

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If U don't hear from me in a few days, then Just Know Am having Brain Upgrade.

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The past can't be forgotten, changed, edited,or erased...It can only be accepted...

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IPhone covers are like condoms; you don't want to, but you kind of have to.

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Theres always that person whom you wish their status was about you.

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When I sit down on a field, I automatically start pulling grass out of the ground.

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Periods are ridiculous girls shouldnt be punished for not getting pregnant.

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I want a relationship. A real, pure, loving, honest relationship. I'm not lonely or desperate, I'm just ready.

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Dear William and Kate, If William is 100% royal and Kate is 0% royal, will that make your son the half-blood prince? Sincerely, curious.

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Facebook needs a button that's the equivalent of kicking someone under the table to stop them from making a fool of themselves.

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Believe it or not, everybody has their problems, some of us just prefer not to discuss them on Facebook.

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When we are bored we get on Facebook, then we get bored on Facebook so we get off then 15 min later…

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Lucky is the man who wins the first love of a woman But luckier is the woman who wins the last love…

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Dear phone, I drop you. I say I hate you. I throw you. I lose you. I forget about you, but I…

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Twitter makes me like people I've never met and because of Facebook I hate people I know in real life.

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Welcome to Facebook! Where liars tell more lies, enemies are Facebook friends, weak people turn into Facebook gangsters, haters complain about haters…

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You know what I think we are most afraid of? Not knowing. Not knowing whether its all really worth it. Not knowing…

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Reasons why its great to be a Woman; We can get laid anytime we want. We never have to buy our own…

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FACEBOOK -Log On -Check Notification, Message, Friend Request -Poke Everyone Back -Go On Homepage -Do The Happy Birthday Ritual -Go Back To…

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As I look back on all that's happend.. Growing up, growing together, changing you, changing me..There were times when we dreamed together,…

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Any change, any loss, does not make us victims. Others can shake you, surprise you or disappoint you, but they can't prevent…

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LAUGHBOOK CRYBOOK PUT ALL YOUR BUSINESS OUT THERE THEN WONDER WHYBOOK. TRUTHBOOK, LIEBOOK, INDIRECT SUBLIMINAL REPLYBOOK. LOVEBOOK, HATEBOOK, QUICK TO GIVE ADVICE…

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When you feel you are alone in the crowd, When you think No one can understand you, When your love is rejected…

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Shoot Ahh Textt (: 949'390'9138.

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Good Morning everyone have a nice 10-11-12 day.

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Dear cupid, next time hit us both!

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Things I do too much? Care, think, and eat.

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Take a chance and drop the fear.

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'Thank God It's Monday!' said no one ever...

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I deleted my status when nobody likes in 1 hour

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Other authors on Facebook status

More by Anonymous

And a tear rolled down her cheek, as she said goodbye; because she's walking away, and she's never looking back

Life is full of change. That's how we learn and grow.

You'll seldom experience regret for anything that you've done. It is what you haven't done that will torment you. The message, therefore, is clear.…

Scrabble - The game is available in Braille. That’s a nice fact. This makes me feel better about humanity for some reason. I can’t…

Everyone needs someone to love, and I choose you.

“THIS tale of my sore-troubled life I write, To thank the God of nature, who conveyed My soul to me, and with such care…

Put on my J's and dance the whole night away Im naughty by nature like Im hip-hop hooray With my hands in the sky,…

Me.. I have been through a lot, but I still manage to have a smile on my face. Im not worried about the past…

Distance is a test of love. many will fail for those who can't withstand it, but for those who can, theres only one answer…

Im sorry I ever tried...

Being betrayed by the one you love is the worst feeling in the world...

Let children support their parents or be imprisoned.

The only person I've ever purposely caused pain here is myself...By simply sharing, caring too much.

“Start a business, not a startup”

The truth is, of course, that the curtness of the Ten Commandments is an evidence, not of the gloom and narrowness of a religion,…