I think a good movie would be about a guy who's a brain scientist, but he gets hit on the head and… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
If you start embracing life's storms instead of hiding away from them, you'll stop fearing them all together; it is this way… — Stefanie Schneider Copy Share Image
It's fascinating to think that all around us there's an invisible world we can't even see. I'm speaking, of course, of the… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Often, the most extraordinary opportunities are hidden among the seemingly insignificant events of life. If we do not pay attention to these… — Jim Rohn Copy Share Image
It's interesting to think that my ancestors used to live in the trees, like apes, until finally they got the nerve to… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I don't think God put me on this planet to judge others. I think he put me on this planet to gather… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Sometimes I think the world has gone completely mad. And then I think, "Aw, who cares?" And then I think, "Hey, what's… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
If I come back as a horsefly, I think my favorite thing would be to land on someone's lip. Even if they… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Think of fear as a 2-year-old child who doesn't want to go grocery shopping with you. Because you must buy groceries, you'll… — Jack Canfield Copy Share Image
We think of photography as pictures. And it is. But I think of photography as ideas. And do the pictures sustain your… — Joel Meyerowitz Copy Share Image
If I had a nickname, I think I would want it to be "Prince of Weasels", because then I could go up… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Do you know someone you would like to change and regulate and improve? Good! That is fine. I am all in favor… — Dale Carnegie Copy Share Image
Just as there is no such thing as a collective or racial mind, so there is no such thing as a collective… — Ayn Rand Copy Share Image
I guess more bad things have been done in the name of progress than any other. I myself have been guilty of… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
If you want to be the popular one at a party, here's a good thing to do: Go up to some people… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
When Coleridge tried to define beauty, he returned always to one deep thought; beauty, he said, is unity in variety! Science is… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Here's a good tip for when you go to the beach: A sand dollar may look like a nice cracker that someone… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
If you're a horse, and someone gets on you, and falls off, and then gets right back on you, I think you… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
What is it that makes a complete stranger dive into an icy river to save a solid-gold baby? Maybe we'll never know. — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
I don't think I'm alone when I say I'd like to see more and more planets fall under the ruthless domination of… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Civilization has made man, if not always more bloodthirsty, at least more viciously, more horribly bloodthirsty. — Fyodor Dostoevsky Copy Share Image
Some Time We Fail To Understand The Feelings Of Very Close People In Our Life Because A Book Held Very Near To… — Ritu Ghatourey Copy Share Image
The other day I got out my can opener and was opening a can of worms when I thought, "What am I… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
If there was a big gardening convention, and you got up and gave a speech in favor of fast-motion gardening, I bet… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
I think one reason I could be a good playboy is I would be willing to spend the time required to really… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
It's funny that pirates were always going around searching for treasure, and they never realized that the real treasure was the fond… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
In the uttermost meaning of the words, thought is devout, and devotion is thought. Deep calls unto deep. — Ralph Waldo Emerson Copy Share Image
If you want to sue somebody, just get a little plastic skeleton and lay it in their yard. Then tell them their… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
I'd like to be buried Indian-style, where they put you up on a high rack, above the ground. That way, you could… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
I hope they never find out that lightning has a lot of vitamins in it, because do you hide from it or… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
I release all criticism. I only give out that which I wish to receive in return. My love and acceptance of others… — Louise Hay Copy Share Image
Do you know what happens when you slice a golf ball in half? Someone gets mad at you. I found this out… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
There should be a detective show called "Johnny Monkey," because every week you could have a guy say "I ain't gonna get… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
Circumstance has no value. It is how one relates to the situation that has value. All the meaning resides in the personal… — Christopher McCandless Copy Share Image
Most people don't realize that large pieces of coral, which have been painted brown and attached to the skull by common wood… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
A good way to threaten somebody is to light a stick of dynamite. Then you call the guy and hold the burning… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
You can listen to what people say, sure. But you will be far more effective if you listen to what people do. — Seth Godin Copy Share Image
Children need encouragement. If a kid gets an answer right, tell him it was a lucky guess. That way he develops a… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
If I ever become a mummy, I'm going to have it so when somebody opens my lid, a boxing glove on a… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
We like to praise birds for flying. But how much of it is actually flying, and how much of it is just… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
