The idea of being a practicing Catholic, it's - for me, it's like - I need a lot of practice, you know… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
“If you’ve never been to a Catholic Mass, don’t worry, it’s still going on, you still have time to catch it.” — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
The reason I say I'm a horrible person is I don't want myself to be presented as somebody who's a great Catholic. — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
I was still rooting for Notre Dame.It's like there's the cultural Catholic experience. — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
I would say I'm - in the show, I'm a cultural Catholic, which is what I was. — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
That's not to say that I'm a well-informed Catholic. I'm still in idiot. — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
I lived across from a Catholic church for 15 years that I never went into. And then I got married to my… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
I grew up in a Catholic family in the Midwest. And I knew people of different faiths and people that were atheists… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
I do have some Catholic stuff that is done from the perspective of an ignorant Catholic. But other than that, topic-wise, there's… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
We wrote about having five kids and bringing them to church. A journalist at The Washington Post wrote this article where the… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
There has been this belief among the Catholic community - and this - I'm no expert, this is my opinion - that… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
I went to a Catholic University and there's something about being a Catholic-American. You know, St. Patrick's Day is, I'm Irish-Catholic. There's… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
Stand-up comedy in the end, unlike the rest of the entertainment industry, is a meritocracy. There's a certain level of undeniability you can work… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share
I think growing up in Indiana prepares anyone for a life in comedy. I do feel like there is a certain kind of self-effacing… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share
Besides hot pockets keeps introducing new products every 10 minutes so I always have new stuff on the topic. — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share
“The song goes, “Morning has broken,” and I’m pretty sure my children broke it. Like everything else they break, if they did break it,… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share
I am single, I don't drink. It's kind of hard to get a woman buzzed when you don't drink. You'll be like, "Yeah, I'll… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share
Babies and toddlers are mostly what I've been exposed to at this point. I'm hoping parenting just gets much easier after this. It does,… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share
Isn't it strange -- when you're single, all you see is couples, and when you're part of a couple, all you see are hookers. — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share
I usually don't have a burger, a brat, and a steak but it is 4th of July. And I need the energy if I'm… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share
“If you complain about how you spend your Saturdays taking your kid to birthday parties, that means you are taking your kid to birthday… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share
I believe that comedians do what they do, and then they get credit or criticism for doing it. There's nothing planned about this. — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share
“Being a parent is a selfless adventure. The worldview of “Take care of yourself first” is no longer logical to a sane person if… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share
“Occasionally, a dog will be presented as some training method for having a baby. "My girlfriend and I got a dog. We are going… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share
Cookies at both of them. The cookies are probably better at Letterman though. — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share
