"When life hands you lemons, make whisky sours." — W.C. Fields

"When life hands you lemons, make whisky sours."

— W.C. Fields

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188 Quotes by W.C. Fields

W.C. Fields has 188 quotes on this site. A few more worth reading:

Attitude is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than what people do or say. It…
The only thing a lawyer won't question is the legitimacy of his mother.
Wouldn't it be terrible if I quoted some reliable statistics which prove that more people are driven insane through religious…
I drink with impunity...or anyone else who invites me.
I have been advised by the best medical authority, at my age, not to attempt to give up alcohol.
How well I remember my first encounter with The Devil'ss Brew. I happened to stumble across a case of bourbon…
Variant: I was driven to drink by a woman. I am forever grateful, yet I never had the good manners…
Prayers never bring anything... They may bring solace to the sap, the bigot, the ignorant, the aboriginal, and the lazy…
I have spent a lot of time searching through the Bible for loopholes.
All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women.
I've been asked if I ever get the DTs. I don't know. It's hard to tell where Hollywood ends and…
Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.

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More Drinking Quotes

This quote is filed under Drinking Quotes, one of 1,652 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:

The gods too are fond of a joke. — Aristotle
Drinking intensifies all your pressures and your needs. — Desi Arnaz
It is a sign of a dull nature to occupy oneself deeply in matters that concern the body; for instance,… — David Bailey
A drink a day keeps the shrink away. — Edward Abbey
Patriarchy is impotent and qualitatively unable to solve even the most simple problems in the cosmos such as picking up… — Roseanne Barr
I know not, sir, whether Bacon wrote the works of Shakespeare, but if he did not, it seems to me… — James M. Barrie
Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to… — Dave Barry
You can't drown yourself in drink. I've tried, you float. — John Barrymore
A gourmet who thinks of calories is like a tart who looks at her watch. — James Beard
I am a drinker with writing problems. — Brendan Behan
Why don't you get out of that wet coat and into a dry martini? — Robert Benchley
Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with that it's compounding a felony. — Robert Benchley

See all 1,652 Drinking Quotes »