Air Quote by Victor Borge

The oboe sounds like a clarinet with a cold.

— Victor Borge

I've always liked using flutes and clarinets. Any time I can use those, I'm really happy.

— A.C. Newman

There are two instruments worse than a clarinet - two clarinets.

— Ambrose Bierce

I did all you can do with a clarinet. Any more would have been less.

— Artie Shaw

Clarinet n. An instrument of torture operated by a person with cotton in his ears. There are two instruments worse than a clarinet –…

— Ambrose Bierce

I look at my clarinet sometimes and I think, I wonder what's going to come out of there tonight? You never know.

— Acker Bilk

Beauty and fullness of tone can be achieved by having the whole orchestra play with high clarinets and a carefully selected number of piccolos.

— Gustav Mahler

The clarinet is a musical instrument the only thing worse than which is two.

— Ambrose Bierce

The ability to play the clarinet is the ability to overcome the imperfections of the instrument. There's no such thing as a perfect clarinet,…

— Jack Brymer

That's the clarinet I used to use... but it's just a piece of wood, you know, with holes in it and they put these…

— Artie Shaw

I played clarinet for many years.

— Nadine Coyle

Actually, when I was very young, first starting to play, I think I probably listened more to clarinet players than to saxophones.

— Gerry Mulligan