““The logic goes like this: If he has the capacity to be so wonderful, then it must be something I am doing that's making things go wrong. The misogynist bolsters this belief by reminding you that he would always be nice if only you would stop this, or change that, or be more of this or a little less of that. This is very dangerous thinking. Your new attempt to make sense of the confusion in your relationship represents a giant leap in the wrong direction. You've gone from recognizing that there are troublesome aspects to your partner's behavior, to attempting to justify them or explain them away, to now internalizing and accepting the responsibility for how he acts.””
