Balance of power Quote by Susan Forward
““A relationship in which one partner can express hostile feelings but the other cannot is based on a serious imbalance of power. Yet, the woman who sees herself as powerless in such a relationship is not seeing things as they really are. She actually has more power than her partner, because he is far more dependent on her than she is on him. She just doesn't realize it. His neediness, his fears of abandonment, his need to be in total control, his intense possessiveness, and his distorted view of reality make him a paper tiger. No matter how powerful he appears, he feels powerful only when he is subjugating and controlling her. These defenses give him a sense of safety but also keep him locked into a very rigid way of behaving. In contrast, once the woman learns to accurately assess her real strengths, she is in a much better position than he is to change her behavior and her life.””
About This Quote
Source Book: Toxic Relationships, 1992
Power dynamics in abusive relationships often mask the true source of control; women may hold hidden influence.
In simple terms: Women can have hidden power despite apparent imbalance.
Key Takeaway
Recognize and leverage personal strengths.
Themes
relationships
power
abuse
gender dynamics
Mood
empathetic
serious
Type
educational
inspirational
When to use this quote
- counseling
- support groups
- personal boundaries
- education programs
Key Concepts
psychology
dependency
self‑empowerment
Questions to Reflect On
- How can one safely shift power in a toxic partnership?
- What support systems help women realize their influence?
A Different Perspective
Awareness alone may not change entrenched behavior patterns.
